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Thieves of Light Chapter 4.

A Saint Seiya fanfiction by Ariane Kovacevic, AKA Fuu-chan.





It was a peaceful night; the stars and the clouds were dancing and playing hide and seek high up in the sky but I didn't look up to watch them. Some two scores of steps below me, the Aegean Sea was assaulting the land, gnawing at the great rocks that formed Cape Sounio, but I couldn't hear the ever present thunder of the furious waves. Meerschaum was carried by the wind and sometimes it reached me and wetted my face, but I couldn't feel it. Nothing could touch me anymore.

Nothing, but the sensation of June-san's silky-soft hair against my skin.

Why the husk of flesh that I was had walked all the way from the heart of the Sanctuary to spend the deathwatch sitting here, above the horrible cell where the Saints who betrayed Athena were imprisoned until they were drowned by the rising waves of high tide or were somehow forgiven by the Goddess, I didn't know. A fitting place for you, whispered a harsh, alien voice in my mind. I blinked, sending the words' echoes away from me. Almost, they had touched something cold, something that was poised deep inside my heart, waiting.

Abruptly, I realized that I had brought my knees against my chest and that I was hugging them tight, the pressure of my arms on my legs hard enough to bruise. A part of me noted with detachment that there was a beginning of tremors going through my body.

The wind chased a few stray locks of hair in front of my eyes, and out of habit I pushed them away. It had taken some time for people to finally leave me alone. Lune and Merle, whom I didn't know, hadn't been a problem, but my brother, Hyoga, Seiya and Shiryu on the other hand...them and Saori-san had refused to let me be. Oh I understood why, I had perceived their sorrow for June-san and of their wish to help me; but I didn't need help. I just needed loneliness and peace, I needed....

Not to exist anymore.

To step outside of reality.

To keep away from the ice which had frozen the core of my being.

There had been fear in their eyes when I had quietly told them that I just wanted to be alone for a while. Fear of the strange calm which had taken hold of me, and of what it could mean. I smiled, thinking to myself that they shouldn't have worried so. The eerie feeling of timelessness which had taken hold of me in the instant of June-san's death wasn't unpleasant, on the contrary. It was shielding me, allowing me to--

Arrow.

I felt my eyes widening as pain blossomed at the junction of my neck and my left shoulder. All of a sudden, the thunder of the waves became deafening, invading my whole being while my cosmo violently flared up, touched by something that I knew. The storm lasted for less than a heartbeat and then was gone, taking the pain in my neck away with it. It may be I should have reacted, then. It may be I should have felt alarmed, but my heart had become a dead void. Nothing mattered, nothing was real anymore, so I just sat where I was, looking out at the night in front of me without seeing it.

Listening at the sea without hearing it.

"It truly is a beautiful night, don't you think?" The one who had come mused. The unearthly, crystalline voice enveloped me, but I discarded it with surprising ease. There was a short moment of silence, then the sound of steps approaching from behind troubled the night and he added in a quiet whisper, "It's not like you to waste time moping around, wallowing in self-imposed guilt and self-pity, Hades."

I staggered forward as if I had been struck by a savage blow, and harshly closed my right hand over my arm, drawing thin lines of blood as my fingernails tore at the fragile skin. I focused on the faint, almost unreal feeling of physical pain and turned to face the other, in a slow motion. Looking Lucifer right in the eye, I told him in a toneless voice, "My name is Andromeda Shun."

"Oh, I know," the Fallen Angel softly replied, "I know you, Andromeda Shun." There was an intensity in the purple eyes' gaze which could have been frightening, but I was beyond caring for Evil's twisted games.

Beyond feeling.

Beyond fearing.

Beyond living.

So I turned away from Lucifer, and didn't reply. Still he waited, as if he was unaware of the emptiness which had engulfed me, as if he thought I'd enter his game...stupidity. Inwardly, I shook my head. I could feel his presence in the air, right behind me, like an eerie echo of music or a dark wind enveloping the night. Gently, he asked, "In times like these, don't you regret rejecting what was rightfully yours?" Something, deep within me, shivered as the words touched the cold that my heart had become. "Don't you regret rejecting Hades' power? You could have saved--"

From somewhere very far away, I watched while my whole body violently shook in the instant that the words hit. If I had been able to, I'd have laughed at Lucifer. Hurting me won't gain you anything, you cannot tear my heart apart, I've already done so myself. Eventually, I once again turned to face the Fallen Angel, and retorted, "No."

He grinned at me, and a flame which might have been amusement danced in his eyes. "Ah, I see I finally got your attention."

A bitter smile came to my lips when I realized that he was speaking the truth. He had played, and won because I had been mistaken on his goal. I had thought he wanted to toy with me, but all he had been aiming for had been to shatter the void which shielded me from reality. He had partly managed to do that, even if emotions were still banned from my heart. Reluctantly, I acknowledged his presence and asked him, eyes narrowing in suspicion, "Why did you come here?"

For a moment, Lucifer didn't reply, his purple gaze locked on me, then abruptly he stared off into the distance and said, "There are many reasons, but one of those is paramount. Let me tell you a secret, Andromeda Shun." The Lord of Hell interrupted his contemplation of the night to stare back at me, and his voice reduced to a whisper as he added, "When me and mine Fell from Heaven, we were cursed and imprisoned in a barren netherworld, never again to set foot in a place where Light shone and warmed the land." There was a frightening mixture of emotions in the outwardly calm voice: fury and pain, loss, hatred and something unnamed, feelings of such inhuman intensity they'd have scorched a mortal's soul, consuming it in an instant. Abruptly, he smiled, waving his own words and emotions away in a single gesture of the left hand, discarding them as easily as if they had been mere temporary annoyances. "The primary reason why I've appeared here, right beside you, is because you're the key of my prison, Andromeda Shun. You are my key."

His...key? The thought echoed within, again piercing through the shroud of nothingness and something that might have been fear brushed against my heart. No.... Unable to help myself, I shook my head, whispering, "So you can enter any place I'm in, but...." This didn't make sense. Why was Lucifer doing this, was he trying to unbalance me? I didn't even know whether he was telling me the truth. Damn it, I couldn't allow him to play mind games with me, I couldn't let him manipulate me as seemed to be his intention. With an effort of will, I sent doubts away and focused on the Fallen Angel, forcing myself to stare at him steadily. Then I asked, "Why are you revealing this secret to me? I could easily use it against you, and--"

"Bar me all access to the higher levels of your Sanctuary," Lucifer continued in my stead, "thus protecting Athena from me?" He chuckled softly, and beautiful laughter filled the night. "She knows, Andromeda Shun. She knows much more than you can guess, and yet she hasn't moved against me. She hasn't warned you, has she?"

I stood up, unable to deny the uneasiness the question had given rise to inside me. Slowly, I turned away from the Fallen Angel and watched the faint reflection of light over the sea as clouds whimsically danced aside and revealed the rising moon. When I had returned from seeking out Julian Solo with Hyoga, I had found something changed with Saori-san. Something small, almost imperceptible, and yet....

No. My left hand clenched into a fist. No, I won't follow where you lead, Lucifer. I couldn't let one whose nature was evil instill the poison of doubts within me. I was a Saint, and I knew my duty. With an almost imperceptible sigh, I forcefully unclenched my left fist and whispered at the night, "Saori-san will do what she thinks is best, and we'll follow her." Without turning back to face him, I added in a voice as quiet as I could muster, "You're wasting your time here, I'm not such a fool that I can't see through your game." A smile came to my lips, both bitter and painful. "If you knew me as you pretend you do, you'd be aware that grief won't make me more vulnerable to your wiles."

The echo of my words quickly died, absorbed by the distant thunder of the waves below, and a part of me idly toyed with the idea of stepping forward, of falling into the void and drowning into the Aegean Sea. It wouldn't be so bad to cease to exist, to die now, before the war carried everything away, no, it wouldn't be so bad. Selfish, said a contemptuous voice inside me. I nodded, acknowledging the truth there had been in that judgement. There was selfishness within me, a lot more than most people would have thought, and sometimes it threatened to overwhelm me...like now.

"Oh, but I know this." Lucifer's voice was a soft whisper which made me shiver in spite of myself. Very gently, he added, "I remember, have no fear." I faced him then, unable to help myself. Something unknown was rising deep inside me in answer to that statement. Fear, refusal.... He smiled at me, and said in earnest, "This isn't a game, Andromeda Shun. This is war, and I can't allow you to go to your deaths, for it'd mean our annihilation as well. Like it or not, Athena has no other alternative than the alliance I offered her if she wants to stand the smallest chance of saving her precious humanity."

Is it true? I wondered, and immediately I cursed myself for being a fool. I couldn't let myself listen to him, it was far too dangerous. Shaking my head, I told him in a voice as steady as I could manage, "That's for Saori-san to decide, not for me. You're trying to beguile the wrong person."

A mocking smile touched the lips of Lucifer, and he replied, the purple eyes glinting, "I don't think so." Sobering, he added, "You of all people should be aware that I'm telling the truth. The war has already started, and you risk losing all very quickly. Hamaliel was after *you*, Andromeda Shun, and he was about to bring you back to Heaven with him. Do you have any idea why?"

I focused on the sound of the waves assaulting the cliff, closing my eyes for the time of a heartbeat. What he was hinting at was too horrible to contemplate, and my mind reeled as the question taunted it, bringing forth an answer which I desperately wanted to remain forever locked in the shadows of my soul. A lie, it had to be. A lie, to unbalance me enough so I'd support him, so I'd give in and convince Saori-san to ally herself with him. Never. I'll never let you use me like a pawn on a gameboard.

Gathering what little strength I had, I confronted Lucifer and told him with a crooked smile, "Because of Hades, why else would he have forborne to kill me? I saw the hatred inflaming his eyes. He could have taken down one of Athena's Guardians easily and yet he didn't, even though he...." I shook my head, unable to go on. All of a sudden there was a savage pain in my chest, which was crushing my spine and my ribs. No, not now. Stay away, I don't want to feel. I can't afford to. Stay away! Breathing hard, I managed to keep a tight rein over myself, and resumed, "Yes, if he'd been able to or allowed to, Hamaliel would have killed me. But all this is absurd, just as your and the angels' interest in me is absurd. Hades died at the end of the last war, we killed him with our own hands. There's nothing left of him." I held the Fallen Angel's steady gaze with my own, refusing to look away, and repeated, "Nothing."

For a few moments, he merely watched me in silence, as if weighing me, then he gave a slight shrug and an enigmatic smile curled up his lips while he said, "Be that as it may, Heaven doesn't seem to care for that small feat of war." With an almost imperceptible sigh, Lucifer suddenly waved his own words away and continued, without the slightest trace of irony or mockery in his voice, "Hamaliel was merely the first. Others will follow and come for you. They will come," he repeated, hammering the point home, "they will kill and kill again until they get what they want: you and Athena."

Sweet Goddess.... Violently, I fought back the impulse to hug myself and to run away from Lucifer. I didn't want to hear what he had to say, I couldn't *bear* to hear it, but I had no choice. His words were ringing true, I knew that Lune's banishment of Hamaliel had been a wild stroke of luck. Lune was a wildcard not even we had expected, but our enemy wouldn't be fooled a second time. I had felt the angel's strength, and I was aware of how high the price for defeating the likes of him again would be. Even if Saori-san and I stayed confined in the temple at the top of the Stairs, it'd simply prevent them from reaching us directly, but....

"If you refuse my offer of alliance," the Fallen Angel continued grimly, the light in his eyes hard and merciless, "it won't even be a war, it'll be mass slaughter."

Inwardly, I staggered under the assault of his words, and bit my lower lip, focusing on the rhythm of my breathing. Truth or not, I couldn't let myself be carried away by fear or denial. I had to concentrate on what was being said, I had to use my mind, and analyze.... Of course! I blinked as the thought formed inside my brain. I was missing a fundamental piece of this jigsaw puzzle, something that Lucifer had carefully omitted to explain during his whole speech. Shaking my head, I looked right at him and asked, "But why? Why do they want to bring Athena and...'Hades' back to Heaven?"

A long silence followed my words, during which the Fallen Angel's expression remained perfectly neutral. Eventually, he nodded to himself, replying with the ghost of a smile on his lips, "Ask your Lady, she should remember by now. All I'll tell you is that the both of you are major pieces in this confrontation." Quietly, he added, "That I don't tell you more should be enough proof that I'm not trying to fool you."

The echo of his voice slowly faded into the night while he waited for me to react, but I held my peace. No matter how his words and the possibilities they hinted at troubled me, I couldn't let him see it. I was out of my depths, I knew I shouldn't have been the one to confront Lucifer, which was likely why he had chosen this very moment to disclose what little bit of information he thought would sway us to his views. I didn't dare flee this place or him, I didn't dare put an end to this conversation; it might be the only opportunity we'd have to learn more about all this.

Eventually, Lucifer heaved out a weary sigh and said with a shake of his head, "You're human, all of you. You *cannot* hope to understand what the malakhim are." The purple eyes set on me, intent and forbidding me to look away. "You cannot rely on instincts or emotions. They place no value in individual life unless their very nature demands it. You are people of many faces, you change and evolve, but malakhim do not. They're one, the emanation of a single, unique emotional essence, they're unidimensional beings who only know the Will of the One who created them. There's no talking or reasoning with them, and there's no mercy to be expected from them, as you well know."

Again, pain assaulted my being while images of June-san falling backwards, her beautiful azure eyes devoid of life, flashed in front of my eyes. I bowed my head, struggling desperately against the storm which threatened to overwhelm me. There was a raw, wild cry rising in my throat, and something which was like madness clawing at my heart. I clenched my hands into fists and gritted my teeth, refusing to give in. No. No! From very far away, I heard my breathing coming in ragged gasps, and suddenly I realized how close I was to snapping and falling into the snare of the Fallen Angel's words. Something sparked inside me, like anger, and I focused on it, lifting my head again to confront the one who was standing before me and whom I knew was very much aware of what his words had triggered inside me. I summoned a smile, half ironic, half sad to my lips, and countered in a voice carefully devoid of emotions, "All this doesn't tell me why we should ally ourselves with you."

Bitter laughter filled the night around us, and Lucifer said, "It's simple, though: your only chance is to take on Heaven itself instead of trying in vain to defend this world of Assiah. If you remain here, they'll destroy you one by one. If you decide to confront them in their domain alone, the Heavenly Host will obliterate you, for you don't know the hidden pathways of the higher realms. We know those secret roads, me and mine, and we have intimate knowledge of the enemy. Your Goddess can bring the battlefield to Heaven's realms, but she'll never dare do so alone. I'm sure she's aware of this now, just as she must know that to make a stand here and protect her Sanctuary means sentencing all of you to die." Contempt flashed in the Fallen Angel's eyes as he added, "It may be she still entertains the fantasy of help coming from her kin, from her father whom she believes rules in what she calls Olympus, but that's nothing other than a convenient lie. There will be no help coming from Zeus, you're alone." He allowed his words to trail off into silence, and then concluded, quietly, "There's only one hope for all of us: to form an alliance against Heaven."

He's right; if what he says is true, there's no choice, none, a cold voice stated inside my mind. Try though I might, I couldn't deny the statement's logic. I don't have the strength to deny it, rather. I was mentally exhausted; the constant struggle to keep the storm of mad grief away and to confront Lucifer had taken its toll on me. My mind was no longer clear...not that it mattered. I wasn't the one who'd make the decision, all that was needed was to get as much information as I could and report it to Saori-san. And there was one thing that Lucifer still hadn't told me. A joyless smile came to my lips, and I asked him, "And what would be the terms of this pact? What would be the price for your help?"

The Fallen Angel's smile revealed his teeth as he said softly, "Since you claim you're not Hades, it's not for you to know or discuss. It will be a matter between Athena and I. You can tell her, however, that I won't demand something she wouldn't be able to give." Heavy silence followed this statement, then Lucifer looked out into the night, whispering, "You have no choice, Andromeda Shun, not if you don't want to start piling up the dead and spend what little time you have left mourning the passing of loved ones until your own time comes."

"I...." I bowed my head, savagely choking down the raw cry of grief which had almost managed to win over me. Damn my heart, damn it to hell, I can't feel, I can't let go, I can't! With a slow shake of my head, I added in a voice from which I couldn't hide the slightest of tremors, "I don't know, it's all so--"

"Unfair?" Lucifer interrupted me, mocking, "Sudden? Yes, of course, it's all that, but that doesn't change the truth of our situation. We all want to survive, and the only way to do that is to unite our forces. My offer of alliance stems from nothing more than that. Just repeat my words to Athena and let her decide, Andromeda Shun. If she wants to discuss it further, she can come to my domain. And before you ask," Lucifer smiled at me, holding my gaze with his, and added softly, "she will know how to reach my realm."

She will know.... But...how? Helplessly, I looked into the beautiful purple eyes, lost, but only found dark mirth shining in them. Mirth, and absolute confidence. With difficulty, I discarded the eerie feeling of cold which had washed over me, and nodded. "I'll tell her your words." Then I turned away from him, facing the Aegean Sea and said in a hollow voice, "Now that you've said what you came here to say, leave me alone, please."

Go away.

Go, and leave me alone.

No reply came, and the distant thunder of the waves once again filled the night around me. Slowly, I unclenched my fists, and looked up at the stars and the clouds. The only thing I wanted was to lose my mind in the darkness, to cease to know and to remember, to be freed from my heart. Weakling. I felt like laughing, all of a sudden, but somehow I managed to keep the sounds locked within. Wind suddenly rose from the sea and enveloped me. It touched my skin, as soft as June-san's hair, its tender caress like thorns tearing at my soul.

"She didn't feel any pain." Violently, I tensed, my eyes widening as the gentle voice reached my ears. Right behind me, I could abruptly feel Lucifer's presence again, like a torch in the night. "It was a good way to go for her. She was a warrior who died protecting the Sanctuary of the Goddess she had pledged herself to as well as defending the one she loved."

"I know," I replied in an almost inaudible whisper, unable to help myself. I could feel myself shaking under the assault of the storm of pain battering at my heart. Tears were clouding my vision and burning my eyes, undeniable.

"If you truly do, then grieve for her. Grieve, and let her go." The Fallen Angel's hand rested lightly on my left shoulder, and I shivered at the touch, unable to move away. "She wouldn't want to be the source of the festering pain which is staining your soul."

Festering.... Yes, it was true, and how Lucifer could know all this, how he could see so clearly inside my heart suddenly became unimportant. The gentle touch of his hand upon my shoulder had once again awakened confused ripples of emotions that I didn't understand. You know, I thought, while a painful smile came to my lips. There's no hiding from you. There's no need to pretend. Slowly, I bowed my head and at last allowed the tears to soak my face while sobs shook my whole body. Lucifer's fingers squeezed my shoulder in what might have been a gesture of comfort, and on instinct I reached up, closing my hand upon his.

Holding on to him desperately.

I need... This time, the keening howl of mourning which was rising up my throat was unstoppable. Still, I tried to master it, I tried with all the will I had left, and closed my eyes as it consumed me from within. ...you. A cry filled the air, coming from me, the inhuman cry of a grief which was devouring me, clawing at my soul and threatening to deprive me of sanity, the fitting price to pay for denying oneself for too long.

Shhhh....

The quiet whisper suddenly filled my mind, and something impossibly soft enveloped me, something which promised to free me from the world, to shield me and to take me to a place where my grief could exist. A beautiful mantle of night, feathers which preciously closed upon my fragile human heart, enfolding it and protecting it from what it didn't have the strength to bear. All I needed was to let.... No! From a place deep inside of me, a voice cried out in alarm, and I tensed, ready to break free from the careful embrace.

Hush. I froze as the voice resounded inside me, both gentle and commanding. Take this small gift, and grieve in peace. There's no trap here, no price to be paid. Just let go, and free your heart.

I did so, unable to deny him any longer, and from very far away I felt myself falling forward, in a slow motion. Distantly, I thought that I would fall down the cliff to my death, that my body would shatter to pieces on the rocks below, that its remains would be washed away by the Aegean Sea, and I smiled, waiting for the shock.

It never came. With infinite gentleness, luminous wings of darkness enfolded me, and Time froze for me, releasing me. I cried, then, I cried during an eternity while the poison of grief spilled away from me. Eventually, I lost my grip on reality and yielded to the irrepressible need to close my eyes and sleep. Then I ceased to know anything at all.




"I must go now."

The faintest of whispers reached me, coming from an infinity of lightyears away. Reluctantly, I roused myself and willed the blissful sleep which had taken hold of me away. Just as I was about to open my eyes, I felt a hand touch my hair in a gentle caress, and all of a sudden something vanished.

Something which had been with me during my sleep.

Something which had stayed by my side and shielded me.

Something inhumanly gentle.

Something warm and softer than silk.

Feathers...wings.

Lucifer.

My eyes snapped open, but I didn't find anyone beside me. I was truly alone, lying on the cold stone at the very edge of the cliff, as if I had fallen asleep there. Slowly, I stood up, and stared at the infinity of the sea in front of me, numb. The sky had started to color itself with all the wonderful shades of dawn, the sun would rise in a few minutes at most.

I waited, unmoving, and stared at the blazing sphere of light while it appeared above the horizon. My memories of the night were chaos, but I knew that the Fallen Angel had deliberately remained here until the very last moment. As if he had wanted to give me as much time for rest and peace as possible, I mused, and a bitter smile came to my lips at the thought. Try though I might, I couldn't understand why he had helped me, but there was no denying it.

I raised a hand to my brow in order to shield my eyes from the blinding sunlight, but stayed where I was, unwilling to move. Whatever it was Lucifer had done had been more than simple help. Without him my soul would have shattered to pieces like crystal, it was as simple as that. Focusing inward, I felt the pain in my heart, and smiled. There was still grief within me, a lot of it and it was hurting like hell, but it was bearable now. Take this small gift, he had told me. Small.... No, not small, but likely far greater than I'd ever know. There was an eerie feeling of serenity in my heart, a strange acceptance of the past and of June-san's death. Thanks to one who was the Lord of Evil, I could go on.

"Thank you," I whispered softly at the sea. It didn't matter why Lucifer had helped me, it didn't change anything to the fact that I owed him for my sanity, and that he hadn't asked me to pay for it. Perhaps it was a mistake to thank him, perhaps I should have cursed him instead, but that wasn't who I was.

You're a fool, and you're way too generous and too gentle-hearted.

I nodded as the memory of June-san's voice resounded in my mind. Tears welled in my eyes as the feeling of her head resting against my chest filled my heart, and I let them run down my cheeks. Yes, I know, June-san. I know you're right, but I've never been able to change. With a painful smile, I allowed the wind to dry my tears, and eventually I turned away from Cape Sounio, starting back towards the Sanctuary.

There were many things I needed to tell my friends and Saori-san. Yes, many things, and many questions. I shook my head, denying the inner voice, and willed the doubts away. Breaking into a run, I hurried to win free of the shadows so that I could feel the sunlight on me again.

So that the sun's warmth could chase away the strange feeling of cold which was lingering within me.




"He said you were his key?"

My brother's angry hiss resounded in the conference room, and I nodded, replying in a surprisingly quiet voice, "Yes, that's exactly what he said." I didn't look at Ikki-niisan while I said this. Instead, I kept facing Saori-san, whose expression hadn't betrayed the slightest reaction to my words. Her face was a mask, but I had clearly seen the movement of her right hand when her fingers had violently gripped the edge of the table.

Heavy silence followed my words, that Saori-san eventually broke, asking urgently, "Shun, can you remember if Lucifer ever came into contact with you before the night when he appeared in the great hall?" The young woman's usually clear gaze was troubled by emotions I couldn't read.

My eyes widened as I remembered something, all of a sudden. Idiot that I am! With a disgusted shake of my head, I told her, "Yes, he did. In fact on the night me and Shaina-san confronted him for the first time, one of the feathers of his wings touched me. I had dismissed it because the feather had disappeared, as if it had never been there...but now that you mention it, every time that he's appeared, I've felt an unexplainable pain in the place where the feather touched my skin." Relief washed over me while I said those words. Relief which was so great that I felt empty-headed and weak in the knees. There had been such an irrational, unnamed fear inside me--

"That must explain it." Saori-san said quickly, and something undefinable in the tone of her voice made my heart skip a beat.

She spoke too rapidly. A strange light flickered in her eyes, gone before I could identify it. She bowed her head, ever so slightly, and I distinctly saw the almost imperceptible trembling at the corner of her lips. So Lucifer told me the truth, then, a detached part of me thought while I watched the young woman's white knuckles as she kept holding on to the table's edge as if it had been the last obstacle between her and a bottomless abyss. I blinked, and fought to master the raw terror which had followed in the reflection's wake. Cold hit the pit of my stomach, and all of a sudden I felt as if I was a stranger in the great room. She knew, and she didn't warn me.

It was as if the place had suddenly been empty.

As if I had been utterly alone.

I bowed my head and closed my eyes, fighting against the rising tide of panic which was clawing at me. With a desperate effort of will, I sent the mad, insane thoughts *away* and savagely bit my lower lip. Curse it, I was the worst of fools, I was reacting exactly the way Lucifer had wanted me to react, I was doubting the one who was the incarnation of all that I believed in, the one whom I had pledged myself to. I focused on the rhythmic rising and falling of my chest as air filled my lungs and then was expulsed, I focused on the too rapid heartbeats echoing inside me, deafening, and slowly raised my head again.

"Shun, are you okay?" Saori-san's eyes were shining with kindness and worry. I smiled at her and nodded in silence, cursing myself for being so incredibly gullible. "You don't have to tell us every word he said," she continued gently, "just what you think is important."

For a few seconds I didn't reply, looking at her and thinking that I didn't deserve her kindness or her patience. Almost, I had fallen into Lucifer's trap, almost I had believed his honeyed lies. You were never meant to be a warrior. Inwardly, I nodded, acknowledging the truth of the words that Scylla Io had told me once. I lacked strength and conviction; and, during a war, on a battlefield it was an unforgivable weakness. Shaking myself free of those reflections with a bitter smile, I concentrated on reality and on the present, on my duty which was to report to Saori-san all that the Fallen Angel had told me. Gathering my memories, I continued retelling the events of the previous night.

"Interesting, what Lucifer said of the nature of our enemy," Shiryu mused, breaking the silence which had claimed the room after I had finished my account of what had happened. "Unidimensional beings who cannot evolve or change, bound to the emotional essence they were created from...." The dark eyes of the Dragon Saint were distant. With a slow shake of his head, he concluded quietly, "The Fallen Angel is right, there's no way we can understand them. They're so completely different that it's impossible, we're simply not wired to think or feel the way they do."

On the other side of the table, Lune snorted. "Pfeh. Interesting isn't the word I'd choose." The young man turned towards Saori-san, and the beautiful emerald eyes narrowed. A grin which had nothing pleasant about it came to the redhead's face, and he said softly, "No, what I find more fascinating is the way Lucifer had to repeatedly hint at the fact that Athena knows much about the coming confrontation, and how he keeps tying Shun-senpai with Hades all the time."

A hard light shone in Lune's eyes as he confronted Saori-san, who was sitting on his right, unmoving, her face a mask of stone. "The Fallen angel's claim that he can't let us go to certain defeat because it'd mean his annihilation, I'm tempted to believe. Just as I'm tempted to believe in his offer of alliance and in his unique knowledge of Heaven that we can't hope to match. But..." Lune's voice reduced to a quiet whisper as he continued, his gaze still locked on Saori-san, "how can we correctly think about all this and reach a decision when we're blind to all the essential elements of this tapestry?"

For a moment, stunned silence fell over the room, then Seiya stood up, shaking his head violently, "You're going too far, Lune, if you imply that--"

"No, Lune isn't going too far, he's just being true, and he's using his gifts to the best of his ability, which is nothing more than what I expect of him." Saori-san smiled as she said this, a beautiful smile full of a strange mixture of pride, gentleness and sadness. Slowly, she stood up and faced all of us. In a soft voice, she said, "It's true that I know much about the reasons for this war, but it's also true that the memories were hidden inside me until very recently, when Lucifer himself did what was needed for me to remember." Nodding at the redhead, she added, "Like you, I believe the Fallen Angel's claim that he wants to survive, and that our defeat would mean his destruction...as well as that of all of mankind. As to the why of this war...."

The young woman heaved out a weary sigh, bowing her head, then faced us again. "Long ago, the ones known as the Olympian Gods were mere mortals. We were men and women who in our folly decided to free the world and humanity from the rule of the One God who had created them." With a bittersweet smile, she said, "Oh, not the loving God described in the New Testament, not even the vengeful, jealous and unforgiving Power of the Old Testament, no," a hard light flashed in Saori-san's eyes when she added, "but an impossibly alien being that no human words, no human concepts can describe. Something that only the most secret and most closely guarded early 'apocryphal' writings just hint at without even coming close to sketching the truth."

Shaking her head, Saori-san waved her own words aside and went on, "We had our reasons, and we acted on our beliefs. To reach our goal, we needed help, and the only one we found, the only one we could use was that of the Fallen Ones. We paid the price Lucifer demanded." Again, something unreadable had flickered in the young woman's purple gaze, like pain or fear, memories of the past, regrets or doubts, and her voice had been shaking while she had said this, ever so slightly. She took a deep breath, as if to steady herself, and continued, "Then we gained what we wanted, and we stole the Divine Light of God."

They.... I shook my head in a slow motion, unable to assimilate what she had just said, shocked to the roots of my beings at the enormity of what the incarnation of the Goddess Athena had just revealed to us. False gods, all of them. And us.... No wonder there had been hatred in Hamaliel's eyes, no wonder they wanted to destroy us.

"Humanity couldn't keep on living under the absurd rule of its god, prey to whims it couldn't understand." Very softly, Saori-san said, "I accepted damnation when I joined my father. When I went to him after taking a good look on the world, I promised myself I'd pay the price and be damned for all eternity if need be, but I couldn't accept Fate any longer. Presumptuous though it may have been, insane though it may have been, unforgivable though it may be, we took the world away and vowed to guard it, to protect humanity and watch over it, to help it in times of direst peril." A self-deprecating smile came to her lips, and she added, "We decided upon a balance between the four aspects of the world, a balance which would insure peace, but with time we broke it, again and again, until...."

"Until we shattered it for good in the last wars against Poseidon and Hades, is that it?" My brother's blanched voice resounded in the air, and he shook his head like a man trapped in a nightmare. "But we didn't know, damn it, we couldn't know...."

"No, we couldn't know what it was we were doing," Saori-san said sadly, "and now it's too late. We must face what the future holds." She rested the palms of her hands down on the table and bowed her head, whispering, "We must face the consequences of a terrible decision made ages ago. I wish that I could surrender myself to Heaven, that I could offer them my life in payment; I wish that I could spare you this terrible war, but it wouldn't be enough, Lucifer said the truth in this also: If they win, the Heavenly Host will destroy this world."

My heart skipped a beat when I heard the sorrow and the shame in her voice. Snapping out of the numbing shock that her words had triggered, I looked at the frail young woman who was the incarnation of Athena, and who was also Saori-san, and I felt a painful lump in my throat. She was facing us, head bowed and her shoulders slumped like a criminal, and on impulse, I pushed back my chair and stood up.

"It's all right." I barely heard the sound of my own voice, overwhelmed by the sadness and the distress I could feel radiating from the young woman who had always guided us and protected us... the familiar inner voice said, who has always believed in *you*. Forcing a smile to my lips, I went on, "You acted on your beliefs, you were true to yourself, and you've always trusted us, Saori-san. You've watched over us, and we know how much you love humanity." I had doubted her before, I had almost chosen to believe Lucifer, now was the time to atone for that. No matter how hard it was to win free of the paralyzing fear which had taken hold of me, no matter how difficult it was to send despair away, I had to do it. Harshly reigning the wild emotions roving in my heart, I told her, "The past is the past, and no matter what happened, nothing can change the fact that we will follow you wherever you go, and that we'll always have faith in you."

Abruptly, she straightened and stared at me. Something like tears had veiled her eyes. "Shun," she said in an almost inaudible whisper, reaching out to me with her right hand, "you--" She recoiled, all of a sudden, as if she had been hit by something full in the chest, biting her lower lip and bringing her hand back against her body. She bowed her head again, saying behind the beautiful curtain of her long hair, "Thank you." Everything in the room froze as her shoulders shook with what had to be silent sobs.

"Shun's right, for once," Seiya said in a gruff voice, unable to really mask his own emotions. "Don't worry about us. We don't care about what past incarnations did or didn't do. What we care about is you and all the people who live in the world. We're your Saints, nothing can change that."

While she quickly reached up to wipe her tears away with her right forefinger, I looked at her, feeling more acutely than I ever had the terrible distance there was between her and us. I'd have wanted nothing more than to go and comfort her, to hug her until the storm was over, but I couldn't do that. Glancing at Seiya, I saw the tension in my friend's body, and thought that it had to be a real torture for him to watch and do nothing. Eventually, the young woman looked up, and said with a trembling smile on her lips, "Thank you, minna-san. Thank you...." She paused to take a deep breath, and then told us, "I don't deserve to have friends as wonderful as you."

"Nonsense!" My brother snorted, the pouting expression on his face a sure sign that he had been moved by what had happened but would rather die before letting it show or admitting to it. Sobering, he looked at Saori-san, and said quietly, "Let's get back to business. Everyone seems to believe much of what the Lucifer said, which makes me wonder whether we shouldn't ally ourselves with him. However, there's one claim of his I'd like to understand: he said that the price he'd demand for his help would be something Athena could give. What does it mean?"

A long silence followed Ikki-niisan's words, then Saori-san leaned back against her chair, the light in her eyes a distant one. "It means what he said," she whispered, "nothing more and nothing less." With a sigh, she shook her head, and focused on us again, adding, "Something which is within my reach, which belongs to me and that I can afford to pay." With a joyless smile, she said, "It's only fair that I be the one to pay, after all it was me and mine who started all this." Before we could say anything, she waved at us in a peremptory gesture, "And I won't hear a single word on this. I haven't made a decision yet, but if I chose to accept his help, I'd pay his price, and none of you would interfere." She looked at each of us in turn, her eyes hard all of a sudden, then concluded, "Is that clear?"

There was no denying the command there had been in her voice. I gave her a silent nod, not liking this one bit but unable to gainsay her. Even Seiya nodded, his brown eyes dark and clouded.

"Is there no other way?" Hyoga, who had kept silent until now, sighed. "No matter that things are likely different from what we were taught as children, the idea of sealing an alliance with one who is Evil Incarnate feels wrong, horribly wrong." He looked straight at Saori-san, and added, pleading, "How can we ever trust Lucifer? How can we ever accept to pay his price? How can we be sure he wouldn't turn on us on the eve of victory, once we'd be too weak and exhausted to fight him? How can we know that he wouldn't trick us, use us and in the end bring his realm of darkness to earth?"

"We can't be sure, Hyoga." Saori-san was smiling sadly. "We can't know. If we decide to accept his help, the Lord of Hell will try to use us, he'll try to turn the tables on us, but perhaps as he said we've come to a point where we have no choice." The young woman stood up, and turned to face the great bay window, through which the bright sunlight was entering the room. We waited while her words faded into silence, uncertain of what to say or do. The silence stretched on, until at last she turned back towards us, slowly. Her purple gaze locked on me, and she asked in a quiet whisper, "What do you think, Shun?"

What I think? Completely taken aback, I stared back at her, lost. Why was she asking me among all those who were present? Why not Shiryu, who was far wiser and more level-headed than I was? Why not Lune who certainly had a far better mind for plans and strategy than I had? It didn't make sense. Eventually, unable to understand the reason for her question, I replied, "I don't know, Saori-san."

No, I didn't know. The matter was beyond me, I couldn't take responsibility for such an important thing. The consequences of a wrong decision.... I shivered inwardly. I couldn't envision that. I didn't want to give her an answer, but her eyes were set on me, intent and forbidding me to look away. There was no trace left in her of the distressed young woman who had cried just a few minutes ago. She was Athena, and she was Wisdom, War and Earth. She was a Goddess who could see the truth of my soul beyond all the layers of lie and self-deceit I might have surrounded it with.

Reluctantly, I focused inwards, and faced the grief which was still haunting my heart. Closing my eyes for a fraction of a second, I summoned the courage to voice the emotions inhabiting me, and told her softly, "I don't know, my heart is torn in opposite directions, like a sail in the middle of a storm. I know what Lucifer is, I know what he represents, and yet I...." I shook my head, unable to go on, unable to put into words the confusion which was clouding my judgement. "There's only one thing that I know," with a painful smile, I added, "I couldn't bear with other deaths. I don't have enough strength to pile up the dead and mourn for them one after another."

She gave me a slow, thoughtful nod, and at last she turned on the right, releasing me. I looked away, then, I looked away and blinked back the tears which had started welling in my eyes once more. Saori-san's voice resounded again the room to thank us and to tell us she needed some time alone to think and reach a decision. I heard her, but didn't listen, focused that I was on fighting to control my emotions. During all my retelling, grief had withdrawn to the back of my mind, but Saori-san's question had shattered the false calm I had thought I had gained.

Hush.

Grieve for her, and let her go.

Something unnamed rose within me as memories of the previous night returned. Warmth spread inside my heart and enveloped my sorrow, making it bearable again.

I hadn't told them what Lucifer had done for me, I hadn't told them what he had given me...I couldn't tell them, or anyone. It was an absurd thing, senseless even, but that thing had happened nonetheless. No matter who Lucifer was, no matter how evil he was, I knew that my memories were true, and I'd keep his gift forever in my heart. Never would I forget the feeling of the hauntingly beautiful wings of darkness as they had enfolded me in their protective embrace. With difficulty, I won free of my memories and of the confused, veiled emotions which had accompanied them, and turned around to see that everyone was leaving the room.

I should have told them. Yes, likely I should have, but there was a strange certainty in my heart: that those moments belonged to me and me alone, that they were a part of me which must never be shared. So when my eyes met Saori-san's I merely smiled at her and went out of the room, following in my companions' wake.




A loud groan resounded in the main corridor while Ikki closed the door of Athena's chambers. The ghost of a smile stole its way to the Phoenix Saint's lips as he thought that someone ought to do something about the centuries-old hinges. If he had wanted to hide the fact that he had come here to talk with Kido Saori after the morning's discussion, the interesting sound would have betrayed him without fail. With a shake of his head, Ikki discarded the futile reflection and made to move.

Red.

Shining like fire, he thought as the bright color registered in his mind, as well as the realization that it didn't belong in the dark corridor. Freezing, Ikki summoned his cosmo and whirled around, facing the intruder.

"Hey, relax, relax, I'm no enemy!" The Phoenix Saint blinked, his brain only now recognizing the adolescent who claimed he was a Gold Saint. Lune was waving his hands in a halting gesture of mock fear, and there was a flame of amusement dancing in his deep emerald eyes. It was the hair which had betrayed him, Ikki mused to himself, yes, that fiery red hair which was like a beacon fire.

Suits him fine, after all he's one of the worst peacocks I've ever met. Ikki let out a derisive snort, very much aware that there was more to the young man than just boasting and arrogance but unable to help himself. I must be allergic to this particular personality type. That brought the image of Virgo Shaka the fore of the Phoenix Saint's mind, and he sighed. Refocusing on Lune, Ikki looked him right in the eye and asked noncommittally, "What are you doing here?"

The young man shrugged, "I just happened to drop by when I saw you going into Athena's chambers. I was curious, so I stopped and waited for you to reappear so I could inquire about the contents of your discussion."

The enormity of the lie, as well as the calm with which Lune had delivered it made Ikki want to burst out laughing...before teaching the redhead the meaning of the word "discretion" as painfully as possible. Allowing irony to seep into his voice, the Phoenix Saint, gave the adolescent a pleasant smile. "Is that so? How convenient. Don't you think you're a little too old to spend your time eavesdropping at a Goddess' door?"

All of a sudden, the amusement in Lune's eyes disappeared, and he replied quietly, "I've always been too old to play games, Ikki-senpai. What I do, I do because I believe it's necessary." The young man's eerily clear green eyes were set on the Phoenix Saint's, and the calm emanating from him was impressive. Waving his words aside, Lune asked, "What did you talk about?"

For a moment, Ikki didn't reply, completely taken aback by the brutal frankness of the question. He had expected the other to try and play games, but this...no. With a smile that didn't touch his eyes, the Phoenix Saint answered, "None of your damn business." That said, he walked away, intent on rejoining the other Bronze Saints and see how Shun was doing.

"But I'm afraid it is my damn business, unfortunately." Lune's very soft whisper stopped Ikki right in his tracks. Slowly, the Phoenix Saint turned back to find that the adolescent hadn't moved an inch and was staring at him steadily. Something in the tone of his voice had sent a shiver down Ikki's spine, and the fire in those emerald eyes....

With an imperceptible shake of his head, Ikki made a mental note to hit himself hard on the head the next time he'd decide to let his likes or dislikes win over cold-hearted judgement. There was far more in the young man who was standing before him than met the eye; not only was he indeed as powerful as a Gold Saint, but what was more his mind was a sharp, formidable weapon which the adolescent knew how to use. Lune was a very dangerous person, one that Ikki wouldn't have liked to have as an enemy, and one he wasn't sure he could trust.

Eventually, the Phoenix Saint gave a helpless shrug and said, "I asked her whether she indeed knew the path to Lucifer's realm, and I also asked her what we should do about Shun being the key which allowed Lucifer to appear wherever he goes." Nothing changed in Lune's expression when he heard Ikki's words, he just kept on staring right at the Phoenix Saint with the same infuriating calm.

With a disgusted sigh, Ikki went on, "She only told me that she knew a way to reach Hell, and that there was nothing in particular to do concerning my brother. For now, Lucifer isn't our enemy, and to start worrying about his comings and goings would just result in a waste of time and energy which would only play against us, not to mention amuse the Fallen Angel to no end. She seems to be quite certain that the Lucifer won't do anything against us, and I tend to agree." Turning away, the Phoenix Saint concluded, "That's all that was said. I hope you're satisfied."

With an effort of will, Ikki chased away the irritation that Lune's presence and questions had triggered inside him. He wasn't about to confide in the adolescent, he wasn't about to tell him how horrified, how frightened he had been when Shun had told them all how Lucifer kept tying him with Hades. No, the Phoenix Saint wasn't about to reveal to Lune what had happened during the war against the God of Death. For a moment, Ikki had envisioned Hades' death to be a sham, he had pictured Shun still being possessed by the malevolent God, but fortunately, Kido Saori had assured him that it wasn't so. Hades had died at their hands, truly died, and nothing could have saved him. Oh it was likely Shun would remain marked forever, his essence retaining a scar or a memory of the presence of Hades, but there could be nothing more than that. Lucifer's constant associations as well as the Angel's were normal mistakes, nothing more and nothing less.

"And her reassurance was enough for you?" Lune asked gently. A few steps away from him, the Phoenix Saint abruptly halted, and the redhead saw the hands on Ikki's sides clench into tight fists. For a few seconds, deep silence claimed the corridor, and Lune wondered whether he hadn't made a mistake in revealing himself and his abilities this way. If I misjudged him....

"Yes." The tone of Ikki's voice was flat. Lune watched the tall man's back, waiting for more, knowing there must be more. Without facing him, the Phoenix Saint said in a harsh voice, "Yes it was enough for me, just as it should be for you. Don't you ever trust anyone, Lune? Don't you even trust the one you've sworn yourself to?"

That brought a half-bitter, half-sad smile on Lune's lips. Touché, he thought, but you're wrong nonetheless. In a quiet whisper, the young man replied, "Trust never was a part of the bargain, Ikki-senpai. I pledged myself to Athena, I swore to serve her and to defend the ideals she stands for. For this, I intend to make full use of my abilities. To win a war you must try to predict the enemy's movement, and you must also know your own weaknesses. Trust will be a very futile and laughable virtue if it makes us lose this battle. But," Lune sighed softly, "if you're satisfied with your answers, it's okay, I guess."

"Yes, it is." Ikki's voice was hard. "If you have questions of your own, then ask them yourself." With a curt nod, the Phoenix Saint walked away, and soon disappeared in the corridor's shadows.

Lune leaned back against the great wooden doors of Athena's chambers and looked up at the ceiling, smiling to himself. If he had been in the Phoenix Saint's stead, if Andromeda Shun had been his younger brother, gentle, sweet reassurances would never have been enough. He'd have pursued the matter and demanded clear answers. Blind, stupid trust would have been out of the question, no matter that Athena was a Goddess and that he shouldn't have questioned the one he had pledged himself to.

A Goddess, indeed, Lune nodded in silence. Kido Saori's revelation that the Olympians had been mere mortals at a time didn't change that. The young woman could say what she wanted, but Lune knew the truth even if she didn't. What she might have been before was unimportant. Time had changed her and all of the others, or so he supposed since he didn't know them; oh yes, millennia had changed her forever. She wasn't human, Lune had felt it in his heart and in the way his cosmo had reacted to hers. She might have usurped her place in times long past, but the lie had become truth. And he would follow her, he would fight her war along with the other Saints of the Sanctuary, but not like blind sheep. He'd go with his eyes wide open, and if he saw a mistake about to be made, he'd move to correct it, no matter whom it'd come from.

Here, though, there is none, Lune thought a bit sadly. He wouldn't go knock at the door of Athena's chambers for answers, he had no need to. He'd been alarmed when Athena had answered Andromeda Shun so quickly about Lucifer's using him as a key, and even more so when he'd witnessed the young woman's distress a bit later. The redhead hadn't been fooled for a moment, he knew that Kido Saori had carefully avoided to answer his own question on the fact that Shun-senpai kept being tied with Hades. It had seemed to Lune that her emotions might have gotten the best of her, and that could be a source of very bad mistakes. Almost, the redhead had intervened, but instead he had watched the incarnation of Athena closely during the rest of the discussion, and he had decided to wait.

Now that he knew what the Phoenix Saint had asked Athena, and what her answers had been, Lune was relieved. It didn't matter to him whether she had told Andromeda Shun's brother the truth, all that mattered was that he knew he could trust the young woman's judgement and mind. She had had time to think on what Shun-senpai had revealed to them, she had had time to review her options and weigh matters before the Phoenix Saint came to her. She had clearly chosen a line of action, and it had been a carefully thought out decision. That was enough for Lune; he'd keep his thoughts to himself and go along with the flow. Of course, if it hadn't been Andromeda Shun but Merle, things might have been different...but it was only a "might".

No more, and no less.




What am I doing? The disturbing thought echoed in Saori's mind, and met a hard, merciless answer, which hadn't varied in the countless times she'd asked herself this same question.

You have no choice.

With a weary sigh, the young woman sat down on the edge of her bed and looked at the simple furniture which decorated the great room that was Athena's chambers without really seeing it. Things had changed so much in less than a week that it felt as if the path she was treading was choked by fog. Saori had been so certain of her course of action when she had told Lucifer that she refused his offer of alliance...folly. She had made her choice without knowing the true strength of the enemy, without remembering the terrible power the Heavenly Host wielded. Light...they *are* the Light itself, the essence of cosmo, and as such.... She had decided, without remembering the infinite abyss which separated human beings from Angels.

What was worse, Saori hadn't even known the truth about herself at that moment. In an undeniably logical fashion, what ensued the return of her memories was that the decision she had made at that time was invalid. She had to reconsider, with the knowledge of all the facts, with the knowledge of how far Heaven was really willing to go....

Oh they were willing to go far enough, quickly enough.

Too quickly.

Saori hadn't foreseen the raw violence and rapidity of Heaven's actions, she hadn't wanted to consider the implications of what her memories of the past had taught her. Chameleon June had paid the price for that mistake, and Shun....

The young woman's left hand wrung her right and squeezed hard. She brought her arms against her chest and bowed her head, closing her eyes for a brief moment. There's nothing else I can do, nothing else. It didn't matter that Lucifer could use Shun to materialize inside Athena's temple, Saori wasn't worried about the Fallen One's presence in her Sanctuary. What was paramount was that Shun stay here and not leave the protection of the temple. If he did, his presence would be felt and the angels would act. There was no doubt in Saori's mind about this anymore, unfortunately, and she refused to allow other meaningless deaths to happen. She refused to run the risk that Heaven would abduct Shun and bring him to Atsilouth.

We could lose it all in an instant.

The thought sent shivers through her whole being, and the young woman bit her lower lip, fighting to keep a tight rein on the fear which was clawing at her soul. Fear...and guilt.

She hadn't told Shun the truth.

She *couldn't* tell the Andromeda Saint the truth.

Saori had seen the dark shadows of doubt tainting the young man's gaze, she was aware that Lucifer's words had wormed their way inside his mind, and she couldn't deny that Shun had reasons enough to harbor misgivings. Oh yes, he had reasons enough to doubt her....

I loathe the thought of what I'm doing, I loathe myself, but.... With a slow shake of her head, Saori sent the futile regrets away. The Fallen Angel's speech had been directed at her as well as at Shun, and she understood all too well what he had hinted at.

And yet, she had told Ikki the truth: Hades was dead. Dead when I pierced his body through with the Scepter, the young woman thought. Still, Lucifer had sought out Shun, he had marked the young man on their first encounter. Clearly, the Fallen Angel had seen or felt something in the Andromeda Saint, something that Saori herself couldn't see...or perhaps something that she refused to see. It could also be that Lucifer was entirely mistaken, obsessed by the memory of Hades and by the pact they had sealed in the past, but that was unlikely.

Raising her head, Saori forcefully unclenched her left hand and freed her right, a wry smile coming to her lips when she saw the red lines marking her skin. This is hard, harder than I ever thought possible. She had almost lost her composure earlier this day, she had almost broken into tears when she had heard Shun's gentle words of support.

When she had felt him discarding his doubts, his pain and his fears to place a deliberate, absolute faith in her.

She wouldn't make that mistake again, she'd keep the pain and the guilt locked within. She'd let herself rot inside if need be, but she'd stick to her chosen line of action. Had she been asked before this day whether the ends justified the means, Saori would have denied that with a passion. She'd have said that principles were absolute, and that to breach them was to betray oneself and taint anything else one might do afterwards. Now...well, now she still felt the same way, but she had no other option. She had crossed the line, but it hadn't disappeared. On the opposite, it was shining brighter than ever, its painful, blinding light a reminder of what she had chosen to betray.

The young woman stood up and stepped over to the bay window which opened on the valley of the Sanctuary. The afternoon sun was slowly waning, there wasn't much time left until dusk. Leaning the palm of her hand against the window's wood frame, one last time she wished she could be true to one who was dearer to her than her own life.

Saori had never known what price Hades had truly paid, she had never known what had happened between her uncle and Lucifer once Hades had gone to the netherworld that had been Hell. All that the young woman knew was that when the gods had met together one final time before parting, Hades had come, and announced that Hell had become his, to be changed into the realm of the dead over which he would reign.

Telling Shun what she remembered and what she suspected would have hurt the gentle-hearted young man and perhaps even broken him, or so she kept repeating herself. It was true, but it wasn't the real reason, or at least not the most important reason for Saori's silence. Telling the Andromeda Saint about Hades could trigger a reaction she was terrified of. She wasn't certain, but what she could read of the game Lucifer was playing had convinced her that the Fallen Angel's words were not to be taken lightly. It would have been easy to dismiss them as another twisted manipulation, but in this case the young woman knew it had been far more than just that. A warning. Cryptic, but a warning nonetheless.

For some reason Saori didn't understand, it looked like Lucifer had told the truth in this one thing: Shun was his key, and he was being careful not to misuse the Andromeda Saint, as if Shun had indeed been precious to him.

Why?

Nobody but Lucifer knew, and Hades. But Hades was...gone. Yes, gone was the merciless god who had been about to destroy humanity and the whole world without a single pang of regret, gone was the god with strangely sad eyes. Gone, even if....

Saori blew softly on the glass of the great bay window, and watched as a glove of blur formed around the palm of her hand. Telling Shun the truth was a risk she dared not take. In keeping silent, she was giving Lucifer as well as the angels a weapon against the unsuspecting Andromeda Saint. She was making him vulnerable, and in a way it might be she was sacrificing the young man. The thought echoed inside Saori's mind, and she bit her lower lip in shame and sorrow. Distantly, she noticed that a strange, vaguely revolting taste had suddenly filled her mouth. The sickly sweet taste of betrayal, she thought harshly. Getting a firm grip on her emotions, the young woman willed the choking feelings *away*, and heaved out a faint sigh which resounded loudly in the loneliness of Athena's too vast chambers.

Truth, loyalty, friendship and trust were luxuries that Saori couldn't afford any longer. Better to lie and perhaps threaten one who was her Saint than to reveal things which would tear his heart apart and.... Suppressing a shiver with an effort of will, the young woman thought that she didn't want to witness what would happen if one day Shun broke.

The Chosen One is always the one whose heart is truly pure. Saori had never thought to wonder about this, but now she could see an answer, an answer that was perhaps more terrible than anything she could have imagined.

At last, the young woman turned away from the contemplation of the mountains below her, and stepped towards the door of her room. The sun would set soon, and her time was up. She couldn't delay her decision any longer, no matter how much she longed to.

I really don't have any choice, have I?

With a joyless smile, Saori walked out of her room.

End of Chapter 4.


Notes

Malakhim: plural of the Hebrew word "malakh". In the World of the Shaping, Yetsirah, the term malakh applies to the beings or souls which live there, which we name angels, but only those angels who reside in the world of Yetsirah. The plural, however, is the generic term for Angels. I used it in this last sense.
The explanation that Lucifer gives concerning the Angels' nature I took from my book on Kabbalah. Of course, I simplified matters. I hope I didn't make too many mistakes.
Minna-san: everyone.


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