[ Watashi ]

[ Tomodachi ]

[ Saint Seiya ]

[ Clamp ]

[ Fanfiction ]

I rubbed my eyes in a futile attempt to send the drowsiness away, and then stretched with slow deliberation, denying the vague tension in my body. There was silence all around me, the darkness seemed to be peaceful and quiet, but still something had drawn me out of sleep. I stood up, instinctively compensating for a sudden lurch of the ship under my feet. After months of sailing over the oceans, the horses and I had eventually acquired a surety of foot almost equal to that of the sailors.

I closed my eyes as I felt a cold breeze on my cheeks, coming form the open portholes which allowed this part of the hold to be correctly aired and be free of the stuffy atmosphere reigning over other parts of the ship. Listening to the night, I tried once again to divine what it was that had awoken me so abruptly, when I heard one of the horses shifting nervously beside me. Stepping out of my small sleeping space, I checked the surroundings, to find them deserted. Puzzled, I walked towards the horses, and had a relieved smile when I saw Nia turned towards the small opening in the ship's structure, eyes wide and ears pricked forward.

I stepped into the black mare's stall, careful to let her know of my presence, and then gently stroked her neck. I know, Nia. The great horse turned her head towards me, and blew in my face, restless. I stroked her left cheek, and scratched her behind the ear. Little by little, I felt her relaxing under my fingers. There was a slight sound on my left, and I turned to see Laigen looking at us, her tail swishing nervously.

Leaving Nia's side, I walked over to the bay mare, and lightly touched the tip of her nose through the metal bars separating the two stalls. She snorted, and I went back to Nia.

See? Not only did you wake me, but you upset Laigen as well, bad girl. Patting her neck amiably, I smiled at her and then left her stall, reassured that everything was all right.

I pondered the chances I had of managing to get back to sleep easily, and quickly got to the conclusion that the attempt would be futile. Perhaps if I got out on the deck to get some fresh air.... Yes, why not? My decision made, I silently stepped out of the upper part of the ship's hold which had been home for so many days that I had lost count.

The breeze I had felt down in the hold was in fact a strong Southern wind, which was blowing the sails and pushing us towards our destination. I went to the railing, and rested my forearms on it, leaning forward and relishing the feeling of the sea below. Looking out in front of me, I saw the tormented shape of the coast, darker than the night. A few days ago, one of the sailors had first spotted the sight of the land that was called Nihon, and since then the ship had been maneuvering along the very complex coastline in order to reach the harbour which was our designated entry point into the country.

Saga was its name, a strange name when I thought about the word's meaning in English. Ah well, perhaps it was a sign of fate, who could know? What mattered was that the horses had been able to pick up the scent of the land close by, and they were growing restless. They wanted to get back on solid ground and feel the earth under their hooves, smell the grass all around them and run freely again. I had to admit that I would be glad to step down from this ship as well, if only to have a chance of being truly alone so I could bathe and rid myself off the stink of working for months in less than healthy conditions.

"So we'll reach our destination tomorrow. It was high time...."

I started when I heard the voice. It had come from the upper deck, above the captain's and Lord Fitzgerald's cabins. Looking in that direction, I saw two vague silhouettes beyond the mast, staring at the land like I had been. The man who had spoken was one of the King's emissary's aides, a stupid and arrogant lordling from the South of England.

"Our destination?! Certainly you jest, Richard. Saga is but a harbour of Kyushu island. Our destination is the city of Edo in the heart of Honshu island. If we're lucky, it will take us a bit less than three weeks to reach it."

There was silence then, while the young noble tried to absorb the meaning of Lord Fitzgerald's words, and I sighed softly. Three weeks on land.... That was quite a long journey, but then I supposed that Lord Fitzgerald had taken into account the fact that we would have to proceed slowly so as not to endanger the horses in my care as well as the other gifts.

"Edo? But I thought the capital's name was Kyoto and--"

There was a loud sigh as Lord Fitzgerald cut the other off. "Do me a favour, Richard, and listen during meetings instead of spending your time contemplating how you can take advantage of new trade agreements for your family's sole benefit. When the Crown decided on sending an emissary to this country, inquiries were made to plan and organize things, and for a long while they seemed to be leading nowhere. Then, suddenly, we were invited to come. The invitation came from the shogun Tokugawa Ieyasu himself. His capital is in Edo, and that's where we're going. I am aware the country has a spiritual or symbolic leader who resides in Kyoto and holds the title of emperor, but the fact remains that according to all the information we've been able to gather, the true power rests in the hand of this shogun. He invited us, and we'll respond to his invitation. I have no wish to ignore this land's emperor, but I will not risk making a major political mistake by ignoring the man who welcomed our presence and may be our sole key in establishing firmer contacts with this part fo the world. Not to mention that I doubt the emperor would welcome uninvited and unexpected strangers to his court."

I slowly got back into the hold, cautious of not disturbing the heavy silence which had followed Lord Fitzgerald's words. When I reached the horses, I saw Nia was still restless, focused on the feeling of the land so close, but out of her reach. On impulse, I walked over to her, and patted her neck in a half-hearted attempt to comfort her.

You know, Nia, I wonder what kind of mess we're being thrown into.

The black mare twitched her ears, feeling my uneasiness, and eventually I left her to go back to my own space and try to catch a bit of sleep before the sun rose.

"When will the horses be ready for travel?"

I shrugged, looking up at the second son of Lord Fitzgerald's pale blue eyes, and replied, "They need a few days of respite in order to regain their ground legs, and to exercise after all those months of being confined."

He shook his head, flinging his short blonde hair in the same movement, and I thought with wry amusement that the young noble didn't need to resort to those affected gestures for people to notice him. The man was pretty enough as it was, and all ostentation achieved was to ruin the whole picture. Somebody should have done him a service and told him...but not me.

"Must it take that long? The journey was already longer than expected, and we're still weeks away from getting there...." His voice reduced to a whisper as he went on, as if talking to himself, "I don't like it. We know the Dutch are planning on establishing a trade post here soon, and given how wary these people are of strangers.... We have to reach Edo before another foreign delegation can take the prize from us. We have to."

I patiently waited until he was done, and then smiled. "But we can leave on this very day, Lord. Although I wonder what gain there would be in presenting the ruler of this land with lame horses as gifts." That said, I turned away and went back towards the stables, not at all in the mood of wasting more time talking for the sake of talking.

Harunobu Arima, our host, had a weird castle, at least by English standards. There was a single keep, in the middle of a rather sizable yard, surrounded by walls made of sharply pointed wood poles. How long those could hold against an invader, I had no idea, but then it was true that these Nihonjin as they called themselves had been introduced to the use of gunpowder only recently. Not that I cared about the strength of the local daimyo's fortifications. What had struck me had been the single keep, with its four-sloped roofs at each separation between floors. The whole of the structure had felt funny at first glance, but now I couldn't help finding it eerily beautiful.

A muffled whinny greeted my entry in the stables and I went towards Liath's stall, smiling despite myself. The dapple grey stallion nodded enthusiastically, and I chuckled despite myself. Gathering two buckets, I thought I was quite glad the stables were contiguous to the Northern wall, nowhere near the keep where all the nobles had taken residence, hosted by the lord of this place. I was also relieved of not having to deal too closely with the local nobles as well. From what I had been able to learn and observe during the journey, there were very strict, precise rules of conduct when addressing oneself to anyone of importance here, and mistakes in the ceremonial were not taken kindly.

When I reached the well, I started filling my buckets, and in the same time looked around me. Observing the soldiers talking quietly in a corner, or taking care of their gear in another, busying themselves with tasks which had to be common to all the castles of the world, I thought to myself that I felt much, much safer being here among ordinary people. The fragile command of the Nihongo language I had gained while on the ship would likely be enough to help me out of trouble in this environment, but I knew for certain that it would have left me out of my depths if I had had to deal with anyone of rank.

Lifting the heavy buckets from the ground, I looked up at the sun shining high in the sky, and felt its heat on my face. It was the end of March, and it should have been cold and windy. There should have been dark grey clouds invading the skies, and rain threatening to drown the green plains in an instant.... But this was not Erin. We were much farther South, and I had been told that this meant the weather would be hotter and drier, the feeling of the seasons completely different. So different.... Snapping out of the gloom which had started invading my soul, I went back towards the stables. After all, I should have been grateful the weather was different, it would likely make the journey on land that much easier.

"Utsukushii uma...."

I froze as I heard the quiet whisper. There was someone in the stables, someone who had come in without my being aware of it. Distantly, I wondered how that could be, to discard the question immediately. The man was right in front of Nia's stall, and the great black mare was slowly turning to face the intruder. I saw the deliberation in her movements, felt the strange stillness in the atmosphere, and intervened.

Don't, Nia.

She snorted, unwilling to listen.

Enough, Nia. We're not among enemies.

Eventually, she shook her head and turned away. As relief was about to wash over me, I suddenly noticed the man in front of me had frozen. Tense. As if he had perceived a threat, or as if he had felt...no, impossible. Setting my two buckets down noisily, I said conversationally, "There's a reason why I requested nobody enter this part of the stables. War horses are dangerous, and cunning. She would have had you before you even realized what was happening."

Clear laughter rose in the air as the man faced me.

"Yes, I can see the need for an interdiction to step in here now." He bowed at me, smiling. "I'm sorry I was the cause of trouble, and I'm thankful for your intervention."

Shrugging, I picked up my two buckets of water and went to Liath's stall, trying to ignore the man's presence and failing. He was tall, more so than most of the men I had seen until now, and there was something about him.... He was attractive in an alien sort of way with his thin, angular face, the long jet black hair gathered in a high pony tail, the strangely wide white breeches and the dark blue jacket he was wearing. But his eyes were what had truly struck me; eyes whose colour wasn't one of the myriad tones of brown, but black. A black as deep and beautiful as a starless night.

As I walked past him, I felt an odd shiver running down my spine, and reflexively grasped the water buckets tighter.

Power.

And something....

I blinked, unable to deny the strength of my perceptions. As my left hand opened the door of Liath's stall, I took advantage of the movement to turn my head towards the stranger. At first glance, there was nothing remarkable about him, and indeed I hadn't felt anything when I had entered the stables. I hadn't even known he was there.

But now that I was focused on him, there was no way I could miss the absolute self-confidence and the power exuding from the man's lean frame. My eyes took in his whole shape, and stopped for a few seconds on the long, slightly curved sword on his left side. Perhaps it came from that, from his status....

Ripples.

I blinked again, but the feeling was gone. Hell, perhaps I was imagining things, distraught at finding myself to be on foreign soil, at the prospect of having to live here, never to return to Erin.... Beside me, Liath shifted nervously, upset by the worry engulfing me, and I fought the disturbing feelings back.

Hush, Liath. It's all right, I'm sorry. I emptied the bucket, and the tall stallion started drinking immediately. I patted his left shoulder fondly, smiling to myself as I thought I would likely have to go back for more water when he'd be done.

"I didn't mean to startle you, but you were the last member of the English delegation who hadn't yet been accounted for. I just came in from Edo, I was sent to escort you to our capital. I could meet with all the other foreigners up in the keep, but I was told you would only be found here. I'm in charge of your safety, and it's important I know where each of you is housed."

I emptied the second bucket of water, and then turned to face the intruder. Those strange eyes which seemed able to see beyond the mask of one's face to gaze into the soul were set on me, earnest, and I told myself I had to stop being paranoid. Nodding, I said, "I stay with the horses."

He raised an eyebrow in surprise, and I couldn't prevent a smile from coming to my lips. It was likely these people had planned something else for me, but I'd have none of it. I had no intention of allowing myself to be forced to live in close quarters with other people before I knew I could feel more or less safe around them. I had no idea what their attitudes and customs were where women were concerned, and I had no intention of being the cause of an international incident. Eventually, the man shrugged slightly, as if forced the acknowledge a foreigner's weird ways, and then told me, "As you wish. I will make sure nobody else tries to enter this part of the stables to get a look at the shogun's gifts."

I bowed my head in thanks, and on impulse asked him, "Is there a way I can get the horses out and let them be a bit free to run? They need the exercise before we can start the journey."

He thought about that for a few moments, and then smiled. A warm, beautiful smile. "Yes, the pastures beyond the Eastern wall are safe enough. Just warn one of the sentinels when you leave the castle. I will make the arrangements and warn everyone so you aren't disturbed."

I smiled back at him. "Thank you."

He chuckled softly. "There's no need to thank me. I'd be a worthless servant if because of me my Lord's gifts didn't reach him exactly as they were when his guests brought them. Worse, I'd bring dishonor on my Lord's name...."

That said, he turned away, and at that very moment I saw it again.

Ripples.

Ripples, all around the man's shape, like a veil of morning dew or a web of raindrops. I stared at his retreating back, wondering at this mystery. There was something beside the strange sight, a feeling, so faint it was almost imperceptible. A feeling a distant part of me could almost recognize, as if something within me had known and been familiar with it a long, long time ago.

I exited Liath's stall, and saw that Nia was looking at me, ears pricked forward. I set the two buckets down, and stepped over to the black mare. Stroking her forehead, I couldn't help anxiety from seeping into my being.

Perhaps you were right after all, Nia.

I laughed in delight, running on the plain with Aodhan and Laigen on my heels. Turning my head, I saw the chestnut stallion lowering his ears flat on his skull, and abruptly changed direction, grinning at both horses when they whinnied in frustration of seeing the prey escaping one more time. They loved this game of cat and mouse, and the exercise was doing wonders in helping them get back into shape. Up one of the slight slopes in front of us, Nia was observing the spectacle quietly, her tail swishing peacefully. She just looked like a horse too lazy to move unless made to, but I knew she had set herself there as a watcher, to protect the herd the others and I represented in her eyes.

Eventually, I lunged in the lushful grass and rolled on myself for a few meters to stop right beside Sreim, who was taking a nap, content to bask in the sun and delicately cut a blade of grass or two every now and then. When both Aodhan and Laigen came to an abrupt halt right behind him, he snorted indignantly, not too happy to be disturbed in this unseemly fashion.

Sitting down on the grass, I looked at the castle which was less than half a furlong away, and thought it was far enough. I doubted the guards on watch could clearly discern my features at this distance, which was perfect. Standing up, I walked towards Nia, whistling Sreim, Aodhan and Laigen to follow me. When I reached the tall mare, I picked up the bag I had left in her keeping and went past her, patting her rump.

Thanks, Nia. She twitched her ears, and I smiled fondly. She didn't like water, but I wouldn't let her escape this. They all needed a thorough cleaning after the months spent in the ship's hold, just as I did.

Whoever it was who had created this plain would have my eternal gratitude: not only was it close enough to the castle to allow me to get to it without raising a fuss and having to accept guards to protect the horses, but what was more there was a small river running right through it and a convenient grove of trees hiding a bit of the shore to the watchers' view. As I reached out to part the curtain of birch tree branches, my fingers brushed the new leaves, and my heart skipped a beat.

This feeling sending jolts down to the core of my being....

The inaudible whispers in the trees....

Dear spirits, could it be? Could it be that...this land....?

Mastering the sudden lump in my throat and the tears I could feel coming to my eyes, I made myself go forward, until I reached the shore. I set my bag down, and took out a complete change of clothes for me, a soap, a towel and brushes. I had no right to expect anything, it was stupid of me. I wasn't even sure I wasn't imagining things. If my perceptions were correct, then it would be wonderful, but even if they were wrong, it wouldn't change anything. I couldn't let myself be paralyzed by the possibility I had just glimpsed. I needed time in order to adapt and maybe manage to be sufficiently in harmony with this alien land to try to open myself to it and feel....

Enough.

Turning back, I saw that Nia was still standing her watch, and that Sreim, Aodhan and Laigen had followed me as I had asked. Hmmmm.... Almost at once, the grey stallion appeared on the other side of the grove of trees, snorting in protestation. I chuckled despite myself. The dapple-grey's ears lowered flat on his skull while Aodhan whinnied, nodding, and I proceeded to get rid of my own clothes.

There, all five horses were now impeccably clean. I knew it wouldn't last very long, but the layers of dirt had now been removed and a daily grooming during the journey to the city of Edo would be enough to ensure they'd be in perfect condition when they'd be presented to this shogun they were intended for. They...and I, for as I had told Lord Mountjoy, I would never leave them. Shrugging the thoughts away, I took my clothes and quickly dipped them in the water, appalled when I realized how horribly they stank, and how I must reek of sweat and dirt as well.

I dived into the water, shivering as I felt its cold against my skin, and also in reaction to the life I could feel pulsing through the river's flow. I closed my eyes and focused on it. Alive.... Oh yes, it was that, this whole land was.

Like you, Erin. Like you, perhaps....

It took me quite a while to wash everything, but once I was done, I felt a satisfied smile coming to my lips. I felt a whole lot better with clean hair and a skin which didn't itch every minute or two. Looking up at the sky, I saw the sun was starting to get low on the horizon. I had spent at least two hours here, and it was high time I thought about getting back to the castle. I didn't relish the prospect of being inside closed walls again, but there was little I could do about it. Glancing towards the now clean bandages, I sighed, and put them on before getting dressed.

There. I put my shoes on, and moved to gather my still wet clothes.

"So, the stableboy is in fact a stablegirl. Fascinating."

I whirled around when I heard that voice, tensing. The man was comfortably leaning back against one of the birch trees, a dozen steps away from me, and laughter was sparkling in his utterly black eyes. Something cold struck the pit of my stomach as I recognized the man who had come to the stables a few hours before.

Damnit. Damn it to all the hells, he had been watching. He had seen me, and he knew. And now....

"Your face is livid, ojo-san. Am I such a frightening figure?"

I barely heard the gentle sarcasm in his voice, overwhelmed by the enormity of the catastrophe. What could I do to clear this from the Book of Time? How could I undo it? I.... Suddenly I felt Nia tensing behind me, and shook my head.

No, Nia. Don't move.

The great mare whinnied angrily, but obeyed. I tried to breathe deeply and to quieten the frantic beatings of my heart, aware that panic would not help me. I needed my wits about me, I needed to find a solution to this mess.

"Wise decision." I looked at the man sharply, wondering if he had perceived the threat on his life and my intervention. He shook his head, smiling. "I'm not your enemy, I assure you. I felt something was amiss when I first saw you, but I couldn't find what. That small mystery awoke my curiosity. Now," he grinned at me, "I know."

I nodded, gathering my old clothes and tying them to my bag. "Yes, you know." I stared at him steadily. "And what do you intend to do with that knowledge?"

He laughed, surprised. "Nothing." Noticing the incredulity on my face, he went on, "What do I care if you're a woman instead of a man?"

"But I'm clothed like a man and I care for horses." I blurted out, unable to understand his lack of indignation at discovering my deception.

"So?" He shrugged. "You're a gaijin, ojo-san. An alien. In my eyes you might eat weeds, clothes yourself in mud or dance to the moon and stars, it would be the same. It's true you don't match the behaviour of a Nihonjin woman, but you're not one of us. Your status is that of a stranger, and I expect just about anything coming from barbarians." He smiled to soften the effect of his words. "You don't have to hide what you are from us."

I breathed out slowly, not yet sure I could really believe what I had just heard. It was just too sudden, too nice to be true. Not to have to continually hide myself, not to fear discovery at each moment.... Nia came to me, and blew softly in my neck. Absentmindedly, I reached out to her and stroked her nose.

"I must admit that the sight of a woman taking care of war horses is surprising, and a bit unsettling, but you seem to manage outstandingly well from what I can see." I looked at him as he left the support of the birch tree and came towards me. He was moving with the elegance and litheness of one of the great predators of the wild.

Could I trust the words of a nameless stranger?

I shook my head whispering, "You won't reveal what you saw?"

He stopped, a look of surprise on his face, and stared at me for a long while before replying, "No. I have no reason to do that. The knowledge may be useful to me in protecting you, in evaluating the dangers around you, but that's all."

Behind me, Sreim snorted, weary of my doubts and hesitations, and I nodded, smiling. Very well, I had no other choice than to believe him anyway. On impulse, I walked towards this tall, handsome man of a country half a world away, and reached out to him.

There.

Yes, there they were again.

Ripples.

Ripples in the air, all around him.

I felt something cold as my fingertips brushed one and went through it, as if I had been dipping my hand into a quiet pond. The sensation lasted for less than a heartbeat, and then my fingers touched the fabric of his jacket's sleeve. I released him and stepped past him, turning back to face him in the same movement.

"What have you done, ojo-san?"

I smiled at him, cocking my head to the side and deliberately ignoring the dangerous light which had flashed in his eyes. "Nothing. You said I was a mystery, and you were a mystery to me as well. I just wanted to check something."

The ripples were like a cloak enveloping him.

They were....

Realizing he was still staring at me with that strangely focused gaze, I told him the only answer which would satisfy him: I told him the truth. "For a moment, I thought you weren't really there, I thought you were just an illusion."

Taken aback, he laughed. "You're a weird one...."

"Aislinn," I supplied in a soft whisper, "Aislinn O'Donnell, but my name should never be uttered." Why I had just given him my name, I couldn't have said. The impulse had come from an unnamed part of me, which knew things of times long past and which I sometimes couldn't deny. Now, for good or for ill, he knew, but there was an odd lack of fear in my heart.

Like...trust, perhaps.

He bowed low. "I'm honored, Aislinn-san, and I shan't use your name since you ask me not to." He smiled gently. "Don't worry about anything, please. You can keep caring for your horses without fearing discovery. I would be stupid to reveal your identity and embarrass your delegation's members. They would be forced to replace you, and I doubt anyone else than you could take care of them so well. There must have been a powerful reason to make the lords of your distant land accept that a woman accompany them under the guise of a man...."

I felt a smirk on my lips at that. No, there hadn't been any powerful reason behind my presence, just my will and the promise of an old English lord who should have been my enemy. I shook my head. "Yes, and no. Where my horses go, I go. I saw them being born into this world, they are the last of the noblest and most ancient stock of Ireland. In their blood flows the spirit of Erin." I fought to master the sorrow in my heart as I added in a whisper, "Now, no such horses will ever tread down the grass plains of my country again."

There was a short moment of silence, and then he said softly, "They're a very precious gift. I had no idea...."

Yes, they were....

A far greater gift than anyone would ever know.

Chasing my emotions away, I smiled at this strange man, who had first been a threat, and might well become a friend. I told him sincerely, "Thank you."

"There's no need to thank me, I--" He was interrupted by Laigen, who suddenly walked up to him and tried to grab a lock of his long glossy black hair. He barely avoided her, but she followed him, intent on catching her prey.

I laughed. "Laigen likes you."

Laigen, stop it now, that's enough.

The bay mare lowered her ears, unhappy, but complied. The man looked at her with feigned wariness, saying, "If that's how she expresses her liking for someone, I wouldn't want to be this horse's enemy."

Chuckling despite myself, I went to get my bag, that Nia had once more made it her duty to guard, and retrieved it, patting her neck in thanks. Then I turned back towards the man, and told him, "I don't think you have anything to fear in this regard...." I let the sentence end inquisitively, and he raised a hand to his face in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry, I asked for your name but I forgot to tell you mine." He bowed. "I am Sakurazuka Sekai." He grinned at me. "And thanks to your presence, I think the journey towards Edo will be much more enjoyable than I had expected."

I stared at him steadily, not in the least moved by the banter or the playful glint in the black eyes. Beyond that, I had felt something else, which he had restrained.

Sincerity.

Nodding at him, I started back towards the castle with the five horses on my heels

End of Part 1.

On to Next Part

Back to Previous Part

Back to my Fanfic page.