[ Watashi ]

[ Tomodachi ]

[ Saint Seiya ]

[ Clamp ]

[ Fanfiction ]

The room was bathing in a soft and soothing light. There was a dull ache in my right wrist. I tried to move, and gave up with a small moan. Hell, it hurt. The cuts of the crystal shards hurt a lot. Very gently, a hand slid under my neck and helped me to turn on the right.

Kujaku.

I tried to say something, but he put a finger on my lips, whispering :

"Hush... It's over Fiona, we're safe..."

His lips brushed mine.

"I love you, do you hear me ? I love you..."

Tears were slowly running down his cheeks.

Fear. Anguish.

Love.

Horror.

Anger. Hate. Burning.

But above all else, love.

Painfully, I reached out with my left hand and wiped away his tears. He hugged me fiercely and I let myself drown in the feeling of him, unheeding of the pain of my wounds. Gods I needed him, I needed...

Cherry blossom petals.

Tears of a child.

I felt sobs shaking me violently. Sakurazukamori, Seishirou... What had he done to me ? Why was there such a sorrow in my soul ? He was a monster, he was the enemy, he... I whispered :

"Help me Kujaku... Help me please..."

His lips kissed my face and my tears with a desperate tenderness. I shook my head :

"He's there... He's in my heart, always... I can't... chase him..."

Kujaku looked at me.

"I know my love. I know..."

Sweet Goddess, the light in his eyes... My pain hurt him, my fear and my sorrow were arrows piercing his soul. He hurt so much. Because of me. Because I wasn't strong enough to accept what Sakurazukamori had done to me. Hell. He could torture me, kill me, destroy me, but Kujaku... No. Never. I didn't matter, I was weak, I was a coward, but Kujaku... I loved Kujaku. For him, I would deny my memories, for him I had to wall away the pain. The fingers of my left hand gently brushed the hair of the man I loved, and I kissed him, closing my eyes. This time, the crystal wall would not protect my soul, it would keep the hurt inside. I ended the kiss and smiled weakely.

"I'll be okay, I'll be strong for you. I promised you I'd be, remember ?"

I leaned my head against his left shoulder, and he held me gently, silent. At last, I asked him :

"Where are Ashura and Yasha ?"

He smiled.

"On the other side of the door. They wanted to give us some privacy."

I chuckled softly.

"They're cute."

He nodded, and at the same time, the door of the small room opened, and I heard Ashura's voice, protesting.

"You can't go in there, I told you. Let them be a while, let them find some peace, let them rest !"

"Forgive me Ashura-ou, but time is a luxury we do not have."

The voice... I tensed. There had been no sound, it had come directly into my mind. So soft, so gentle... Two young women entered in the room, glowering, apparently angry at something, accompanying a third one.

A third eye, painted on the brow.

The girl they were protectviely hovering about had a third eye painted on her brow. I heard Kujaku's small chuckle. I felt fear in my heart. Kanoe... Kanoe had had the same mark... No. Not exactly the same, but...

"Please, don't be afraid Fiona-dono..."

I looked at her, glad to have Kujaku's arm around me for protection. She had 'talked' as if to a child. Her eyes... Blind, red. Her long hair was white. An albino ? Why did I have the feeling she was ancient ? Far far older than she looked... Her two servants said angrily :

"You could at least show proper respect ! The princess has made you the great honour of coming to you and you..."

The princess in question said gently :

"Souhi... Hien... Please stop. Our guests have been through much, they mean no disrespect..."

She knelt on the wood floor in front of us and bowed.

"I am honoured you accepted to come to me. I am Hinoto..."

Kujaku cut her, his voice deceptively soft.

"We hadn't much choice in accepting your invitation your highness. I for one am curious to know why the Eye of the Oracle is painted on your brow."

She stiffened, looking at him with her blind eyes.

"You..."

She bowed her head.

"I bear this sign because I Dream of the Future..."

The earth, made of glass.

Destruction.

Cities laid waste.

Death.

People. Survivors.

One of them... How can he know...?

Kamui !

Dragons, fighting.

Once the Choice has been made, the outcome is foreordained.

The earth will live. Or die.

Flicker in the Flow of Time.

Ripple in the ocean.

Pebble in the pond.

Shining jewels. Chaos.

Crystal ball shattering.

Darkness.

I breathed deeply, leaning against Kujaku. Damn it, I hadn't expected this, it was like a Vision, it was... I felt my body shaking painfully. My eyes focused on an imaginary point in front of me. I had to keep the feelings inside, the shield had to hold. I bit my lower lip. For Kujaku. He hugged me protectively, saying angrily :

"So you really can See. I believe you, you didn't have to hurt her !"

"Hurt ?... I didn't know, I didn't mean..."

There was intense surprise in the princess's 'voice'. Regrets too.

"Frankly, I don't really care if you meant it or not. Who are you ? What is your place in this puzzle ?"

She looked at us steadily.

"I am the Dreamer. I have Dreamed the End of the World. I gather the Seven Seals, the Dragons of Heaven whose Fate it is to fight for the survival of Humanity..."

Dragons, fighting in the sky.

Dragons defending desperately a tower.

Dragon blood painting the tower...

"Kanoe, my sister, is gathering the Seven Minions, the Dragons of Earth whose Fate it is to fight for the survival of the earth... And the Destruction of mankind... And on the Promised Day, we shall live, or die..."

She looked directly at me.

"But you have been troubling my Dream, Fiona-dono. You, and the Seals you bear. I had to bring you here. You could break the Balance, if ever you were to free Chaos..."

I smiled bitterly.

"It must not happen. I know, believe me princess, much better than you can guess."

She sighed wearily.

"I do not doubt you, Fiona-dono, but you must not forget your mate's Vision. Whether you want it or not, someone or something will try to loosen Chaos upon this world. If it happens, everything will perish."

Her knowledge hurt her. Her Dreams weighed on her heart and her soul, so heavily. She was not free. She could never be free of them. As I could never be free of the emotions. I shook my head, closing my eyes. Kujaku said in a tight voice :

"We came here to prevent my Vision from being true. Do you think we would help your enemy ?"

Her voice was kind.

"No. But who knows what will happen once the two Kamuis will face one another..."

My eyes snapped open.

"Two ?"

She nodded.

"Yes. The Kamui you know and his twin star..."

Two men. Each the other self of the other. Sharing a soul, sharing a love. Each the other self of the other... I shuddered, remembering.

Kotori.

No... Somehow, I managed to choke down the cry in my throat.

"The one who was Fuuma. Kamui... If I needed you here, it is to protect the Seals of Chaos, and also because we need help, if you are willing to give it..."

She bowed her head.

"The Shinken, the Holy Sword that Kamui must wield on the Fated Day has been stolen..."

Two swords. Magnificient. Two men. Two swords, crying. Reflections in a crystal pond.

"If we cannot get it back, the Dragons of Earth will destroy humanity."

She waited during a long time, excpecting an answer. When none came, she asked :

"Will you help us ? Please..."

I nodded and Kujaku sighed.

"Yes. Although I do not like the power play I see here, we will help you, because we can see no other way out. We are ready to discuss anything you wish, but you will leave Fiona out of this. You will let her rest, and you will protect her."

His voice hardened.

"If you fail on that, you will have Dreamed your last Dream princess."

She stopped her servants with a small gesture, bowing.

"So be it..."

She smiled sadly.

"If we fail in protecting Fiona-dono, I will die, be it by your hand or by the hands of Chaos. Will you and your friends come with me ?"

Kujaku made me lie back on the bed, gently. I tried to protest, but he kissed me softly, whispering :

"Hush love, let us take care of things for a while. You need to heal, you need to find strength. Rest..."

Hell, that didn't suit me. But I hadn't much choice. I was weak, I was wounded, and completely unable to defend myself. I would have been nothing but a burden. Well, I had to acknowledge that truth, I didn't have to like it. As Kujaku, Yasha and Ashura left the room with the princess and her servants, I closed my eyes and let myself drift away into slumber.

My left hand rested cautiously against the bay window. The pain was bearable, but I didn't know how much time it would take for me to heal completely. On the other side of the window was a beautiful garden. But the light illuminating the plants was artificial. We were below the ground. Out of reach of intruders. Or so I had been told.

When I had woken up, Kujaku and the others still hadn't been back. I had no idea how much time I had slept. It could have been an hour, or a few minutes... I shook my head, refusing to see the picture of cherry blossoms which haunted my mind. Refusing to remember his words, his touches, and my own abandon. I had let him into my soul. I shivered. I had let him hurt me, I had let him...

Ice.

Fire.

I whirled around.

Purple eyes. Liquid fire. Flames of hate and sorrow. Devouring.

Kamui.

He came to me, and said calmly :

"Sumeragi told me he couldn't have reached me if you hadn't prevented me from falling too deep in the first place..."

He smiled.

"I came to thank you..."

His right hand hit me savagely and I fell heavily on the wood floor, too stunned to react.

A weak moan of pain left my throat. Oh Gods my wrist and my flank...

"Damn you..."

I looked at him helplessly.

"Damn you ! What right had you to do that ? Do you know what you have done ? Have you the foggiest idea of what you have done...?"

The two people he loved.

The two people he wanted to protect.

The two people for whom he had wanted the earth to live.

The two people for whom he had Chosen Fate.

Dead. Changed. Possessed. Gone.

Kotori. Bleeding. Dying. Dead.

Fuuma. Fuuma... Eyes alight with malevolent pleasure as he stroked Kamui's face gently, as he plunged the Shinken right into Kotori's heart.

Kotori...

Fuuma...

Ghosts, voices, faces haunting his soul during every second of his waking and sleeping moments. Tormenting him, ripping his heart to shreds. Burning his soul again and again, mercilessly.

Sobs shook me. Gods, I had... By saving his life, even if indirectly, I had comdamned him to feel this, to...

"You are lucky the Shinken has been stolen from me, or your blood would be watering this garden !"

I looked at him woodenly, whispering :

"Go ahead, end it... I deserve it... I know..."

I smiled suddenly.

"Besides, if I die no one will ever have the Seals..."

I laughed.

"End my miserable life, I will not defend myself."

He knelt beside me. He looked at me during long time, then said :

"So you too know the pain of living... Death is a way out far too easy, don't you think ?"

No. He hated me, he wanted to kill me, I could feel his anger, his sorrow and his despair, in desperate need of release. I said through clenched teeth :

"Damn you, will I have to tell you the whole thing ? Must I tell you that the first time I saw Kotori I shared the Vision of her death ? Must I tell you that I knew and did nothing ? Must I tell you that the first time I saw you and Fuuma I shared the Vision of... The other ?"

I felt hot tears soaking my face.

"Must I tell you I saw Fuuma raising his sword above Kotori ? Must I tell you I saw him plunge it in her heart and did nothing ? Must I tell you I felt her die ? Damn you..."

I cried :

"Kill me !"

I couldn't bear it anymore. I wanted peace, I wanted forgetfulness. I wanted rest... His right hand brushed my face softly, regretfully and he shook his head, whispering :

"No..."

His eyes locked on mine.

"You hurt. You're in such pain... You feel such guilt... As I do... Had it been in your power, would you have done anything ?"

I nodded.

"I would have given my life."

He smiled sadly.

"So would I have. But neither you nor I were given that opportunity. You must live, as I must. Because there are still people who need us..."

His expression hardened.

"I will save Fuuma. I will bring him back. I must live for that. I am sure you can find a reason too..."

Kujaku. Shame engulfed me. Hell. I had wanted an escape, I had thought only of myself. I hadn't thought of him, even during a second. Gods, how could I dare say I loved him ? I... Kamui hugged me gently, saying :

"Don't be too harsh on yourself. I understand the need for oblivion, believe me. Sometimes, it can eclispe even love..."

He released me.

"But love always remains. Sumeragi taught me that. If I had been unable to feel it, I wouldn't have come back... Find it beyond the pain..."

His fingers wiped the tears away.

"I forgive you."

Suddenly, the sound of hands clapping echoed in the room.

"Bravo, beautiful performance. Very moving..."

I tensed. There was so much sarcasm in the voice... Masking pain. Masking hate. Masking... Love.

Subaru Sumeragi.

Kamui helped me up gently, cautious of the wounds and I managed to retain my balance, to stand up unaided. Softly, his fingers touched the bruise he had made on my cheek and I saw regrets in his eyes. He whispered :

"I'm sorry. Please forgive me. And live."

I refrained the overwhelming urge to laugh in his face and looked at Sumeragi. Kamui asked him :

"Is the discussion ended then Subaru-san ?"

Sumeragi shrugged.

"I don't know, and frankly I don't care. The End of the World is not my concern. You know that, don't you ?"

Kamui nodded worldessly, and Sumeragi smiled.

"Okay. Could you please leave miss Fiona and I alone for a while ? We have things to discuss..."

Kamui looked at me during a few seconds, then went quickly out of the room. I turned away from Subaru Sumeragi's deep emerald eyes, focusing on the garden. I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't want to tell him. I didn't want to remember. He came beside me, and watched the trees and the plants, silent. At last, he said angrily :

"I warned you. But you didn't go. You didn't leave Japan..."

He looked at me.

"And of course he found you..."

I looked away.

"He caught you. You tried to escape, to defend yourself, but he won..."

I shivered.

"He played with you. He hurt you..."

I felt a lump in my throat.

"He touched your heart. He raped your soul..."

Gods. I bowed my head.

Cherry blossom petals flying with the gentle spring breeeze.

Young child gathering flowers.

Watching the blood as it was being drunk by the earth.

Watching the body of his best friend.

Seishirou Sakurazuka. Sakurazukamori. Hunger. Thirst. Impossible to quell.

I whispered weakely :

"Do you enjoy doing this ? Damn you I know what he did to me. I don't need you to remind me. I know..."

He laughed bitterly.

"Enjoy ? Fiona Watson, this word makes no sense to me. Why did you stay ? Why didn't you run while you could ?"

I faced him, taken aback.

"But surely... You know... The Vision of the End of the World..."

He looked at me steadily.

"If this is your only reason, then you are a fool. Nothing is worth facing Sakurazukamori. And certainly not that... Tell me, why do you care ? Why do you want this world to live ? Why do you want to live ? I thought you were tired of the pain..."

I backed away from him, feeling emptiness invading my heart. Feeling... I said in a toneless voice :

"Yes... Yes I have had more than enough. I want it to end. I know I will never forget. I know I will never heal. I know the pain will always gnaw at my soul. Until I die..."

I smiled sadly.

"But Kamui-san reminded me I had to live. For love. For Kujaku. Because I love him, because he loves me. Nothing will ever break that bond. Because he needs me. Because dying would be selfish. Because dying would be easy..."

I gritted my teeth.

"And because I do not intend to let Fate decide for me. Because I am free. Because I will never bow to what is foreordained..."

I turned my back on him.

"Now that you have your answer, go away. I have nothing more to tell you."

Suddenly, I felt his presence right behind me.

"He will come back for you, you know..."

I closed my eyes, denying the fear.

"So do not expect me to let go of you. I will stay, until he comes, and then it will end."

The feelings radiating from him... I shuddered.

"Who is the hunter, and who is the hunted in your game Sumeragi-san ?"

I shook my head.

"Believe me you are wrong if you think he is your prey. He..."

My voice reduced itself to a barely audible whisper.

"He hunts the both of us. He told me so himself. You are the one playing into his game, you are..."

I froze, understanding all of a sudden.

"You... You... Love him..."

I focused desperately on my crystal wall.

"This mask of hate and indifference... It is a shield... Against the outside... And yourself..."

Love.

Innocence.

Happiness.

Seishirou-san...

My friend... My strength...

My shield... My refuge...

My love...

Seishirou-san...

Pain.

Disbelief.

Horror.

Love. Betrayed. Crushed. Mercilessly. Tortured.

Onee-san... No, Hokuto-chan...

Sacrificed.

Dead. Because of me.

Dead. Because I couldn't face the truth.

Sakurazukamori...

I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you !

I don't love you. I don't. I can't.

You tore my soul apart.

You broke my heart.

You betrayed my love.

You didn't even bother to take my life...

You didn't even bother to end it...

I do not love you.

I HATE YOU !

I hate you... I... love... you...

NOOOOOOOOO !

I whispered, ignoring the tears stinging my eyes :

"I am sorry. Forgive me, I shouldn't have... I had no right to say that. I had no right to hurt you like this... I hadn't understood..."

There was a weak chuckle behind me.

"Hell, no. It's not your fault. I should have known better than to come to an empath with my shields weakened. I gave a lot to pull Kamui-san out of his dream of death..."

His hands rested gently on my shoulders.

"At least with you I can be honest. To you I don't have to hide the truth. You understand. You know..."

He hugged me soflty.

"You felt him. He touched you. You let him reach your soul. He hurt you..."

Emptiness.

Hunger.

Thirst.

Amusement.

Desire.

Love. Love of the hunter for the prey who gave him a good hunt.

I shook my head desperately. No. No I couldn't face that. I couldn't remember that. I couldn't feel that. I...

White feathers.

Soft. Soothing.

All around.

Drowning my grief.

Absorbing my pain.

Something was tenderly stroking my hair. Someone was rocking me gently, whispering meaningless words, soft and soothing. Subaru. I closed my eyes, yielding to his embrace.

"Thank you..."

He said, sighing :

"Your thanks are unnecessary. I hadn't perceived... I hadn't understood how much he has hurt you..."

He hugged me carefully.

"And even though I love him, I promise you that next time we meet I will kill him. For you. Because even if I can... if I can go on loving him after what he did to me... I cannot let him hurt others like you. Next time, I will not let him leave my kekkai..."

His fingers brushed my face, like the caress of white feathers.

"Sleep Fiona, rest... Forget..."

The feathers covered me, making a warm shield. It felt so safe...

Children laughing in the shadow of a beautiful cherry tree...

I...

Gentle breeze, chasing the vision away.

"Sleep Fiona..."

That voice...

"Steve ?..."

A gentle smile.

"Yes... I am here Fiona. I am beside you. I am never away from you. I will guard your dreams. He will not trouble them. I promise you..."

I could feel his strong presence, everywhere and nowhere at once.

"Where are you ?"

He chuckled.

"I told you. Beside you... But in the waking world... Not so far away... I cannot trust the people you have gone to. Not yet. Not as long as you do not trust them yourself. Until then, I will remain where I am. But I will watch over you..."

The breeze stroked my cheek.

"Nothing can harm you Fiona. You can rest. You can lower your shield, you can break the crystal wall now..."

I protested.

"But the feelings... They..."

He whispered softly :

"Have no fear. I told you I would protect you, didn't I ?"

No... No he...

"You can't mean..."

Very gently, he said :

"I am your friend Fiona. And I will help you. This is what friends are for... Isn't it ? Now sleep my gentle friend. Sleep and heal..."

Darkness claimed me and I let it engulf me, unable to resist.

End of Part 7.

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