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Cheating Fate - Part 5

A Rg Veda fanfiction by Ariane Kovacevic, AKA Fuu-chan.





I sighed, closing the door behind me. It was late, there wasn't anyone in the living room. I looked towards my parent's room, and wondered about Ashura and Yasha. I hoped Ashura was okay. I remembered the expression on her face, and worry gripped my heart. So many things had happened today, I hadn't even thought of inquiring if things had turned out all right for them. I went to the kitchen and filled an old vase with water. I couldn't help smiling as I looked at the beautiful red rose Kujaku had given me.

I chuckled quietly. I was a fool, and he was too. This was one of the oldest tricks I knew, it was as if he was doing his courtship by the book... And it worked ! He was so strange, so kind, so wise and old-fashioned... He was fascinating, that was certain. I took the rose and felt a stinging pain in my thumb. Oh shit. I sucked the droplet of blood, and thought I should have paid more attention. I knew that roses had thorns.

I shook my head. It was ridiculous to try and rationalize what I felt. Suddenly, there was light in the corridor, and I saw Yasha coming towards me.

"You're back Fiona..."

I smiled gently.

"Yes. I'm sorry I'm so late... Tell me, how is Ashura ?"

He looked at the rose in its vase.

"She's asleep. She'll be all right..."

There was a long time of silence, during which I watched him closely. The expression on his face was somber. He looked sad, afraid and despaired. What was going on ? I took the vase and brought it into the living room, wondering. When I came back in the kitchen, he still had that look of hopelessness on his face. I leaned on the kitchen table and asked him :

"Yasha-ou, are we friends ?"

He sighed.

"I told you there was no more reason to use the honorific... I am Yasha. Simply that..."

He looked at me.

"You have been kind to us, you have offered us a place in which to live... I don't understand why you did all this, I can't see your interest in helping us, so I guess that you're sincere... Then I suppose it can be said we're friends... after a fashion..."

I nodded.

"You don't like me much... Do you ?"

He sighed.

"It has nothing to do with liking you. I cannot afford to give my trust too easily. I have to protect Ashura."

I smiled as I heard this. In a way, Kujaku and he were much the same. The fool had insisted to do most of my chores at the riding club, and I hadn't been able to prevent him. I smiled fondly, silenced the warm feeling in my heart and faced Yasha.

"Won't you tell me what's wrong ? Won't you let me try to help ?"

He bowed his proud head.

"Even if I wanted to tell you... It's not my place to do so, and besides I don't think there's anything you can do..."

"Yasha..."

We both turned towards the kitchen door. Ashura was standing there in a nightrobe too big for her frail body. She looked very tired. Yasha went to her and asked gently :

"What is it love ?"

She snuggled against him.

"I woke up and wondered where you were..."

She looked at me and smiled.

"I'm glad you're back Fiona..."

I nodded.

"And I'm happy to see you're better..."

Suddenly, I saw that the nightrobe had slipped on her arm, and that her chest was partly uncovered. But... I exclaimed :

"You !... Your..."

I blushed. She had no breasts. I stammered.

"Ah... Ah... You have no... You..."

She realised what was going on and covered herself, blushing slightly, while Yasha was glowering at me.

"You're a... a man ?"

She... Er well... He... Oh hell !... giggled.

"No... Well, it's a bit complex, but I'm no transvestite if that's what you think..."

She/he looked at Yasha, serious all of a sudden.

"Yasha, can I tell her ?"

He sighed.

"It's not my decision to make, but I hope you've thought about this..."

She/he nodded, and I raised a hand.

"Time out please !"

I shook my head.

"I need a drink, a strong drink... Care to join me ?"

They both grimaced and I shrugged. I went quickly to the bar, checked the bottle of Metaxa and filled myself a glass. That done, I went back to the kitchen, sat down, drank a long swallow and smiled :

"Okay, I'm ready now."

Yasha shook his head, seemingly ashamed of my behaviour. Ashura looked out the window, a sad and wistful expression on her/his face.

"I am neither male, nor entirely female. I was born that way. To make a long story short, I was punished for a sin my father commited."

Taken aback, I muttered :

"That's unfair."

She/he sighed.

"That is irrelevant I'm afraid. I am used to being like this, it doesn't bother me. I am female in my soul anyway... But what I've been wanting to tell you is far more important. It is partially tied to my state. You see..."

She bowed her head.

"I am Ashura-ou. There is a heavy heritage that comes with the name. Ashura-ou is the god of war... And of all that goes with it..."

I shivered, thinking 'Destruction'.

"There is a dark aspect to me, but it has been imprisonned. It... It is not me, I am not... Not like that, you must believe me..."

There was a pleading look in her eyes.

"But sometimes, the other's slumber is disturbed and it moves... That is what happened when we met, and this morning. If we asked you to leave, it was to protect you... It never really wakes, but I might hurt you without meaning to, and it's the last thing I want..."

Suddenly, I had a vision of the dark figure drinking the blood dripping from its sword and shuddered. No... No, it couldn't be. Ashura was not like that, she could never be like that. A hand touched my left shoulder and I jumped, tensing. Ashura asked me worriedly :

"What's wrong Fiona ? You're so pale..."

Hell, my heart was ready to burst. I chased the gods rotted vision away, angry with myself for even considering Ashura might be the monster of my nightmare, and smiled gently.

"I'm okay..."

My right hand covered hers.

"Don't worry, it doesn't matter to me if you are the god of war, you are my friend, you'll always be."




"Hey, why the glum look ?"

I looked at Kujaku and Shadow, and sighed, trying to smile.

"Nothing, I was just thinking..."

He shortened his rein, bringing his horse close to Cloud, who snorted threateningly.

"You've had that dark face since we started our ride... Come on, we're here to enjoy ourselves !"

He spurred Shadow, who reared and Cloud gave a strong kick in anwser, forcing me to focus on my riding.

"I'll race you to the end of the third pasture. The winner pays for the supper !"

Laughing, he gave Shadow the bit, and started at a gallop. Swearing, I muttered :

"God damned crazy rotten fool ! Go Cloud !"

The big stallion rushed ahead, and I leant on his neck, giving him a free rein. His antagonism with Shadow was a sufficient reason to make him give the best of himself.

I saw Kujalu heading for the short path between the second and third pasture, and swore. There was a risky jump on that way, and I couldn't do this with Cloud. Damn, he was cheating again ! I should have known he'd find a sure way of winning... As I stopped Cloud at the end of the race, he came to me and offered me his help.

"My lady, can your lowly servant help you to dismount ?"

I ignored him and jumped down, sulking.

"You cheated."

He had the most innocent look on his face.

"Me ?... But you were free to take the same way I did..."

He smiled happily.

"So, since the supper's on you, I wish to go to that French cuisine restaurant..."

I should have guessed. He took my hand and led me to the nearest oak tree, sat down, and made me sit too, holding me close. Playfully, he nuzzled against my neck and I relaxed, unable to help myself. The feeling of him was so good, so comforting. I leaned against him and closed my eyes, focusing on the light touch of his lips kissing my shoulders and the sides of my neck.

I felt myself slowly drifting, and let go. He had that magical effect on me, with him I could forget everything, as if living outside of time.

Purple and black...

I tensed, recognizing the image, but it was too late.

"Dark Light engulfing the stars..."

Cries, pain and death...

No... No ! I tried to open my eyes, but the vision had me, I was trapped.

"The center of the Six shimmers..."

A sword, awash with blood... A light...

Desperately, I tried to move, to free myself, but I suddenly felt arms gently, but firmly holding me. I tried to fight them, but couldn't break their hold.

The sword's hilt, shining, two points in the hilt, shimmering...

"Black or white, Order or Chaos..."

Piles of corpses, laughter, so cruel...

"There is only one Fate and no escape..."

Dark figure, coming towards me... Lifting its sword... Lightning illuminated the scene and I saw... Ashura.

"NO !"

Suddenly, the vision disappeared, and I felt Kujaku's arms holding me, I felt his strong body against mine. I shuddered. He whispered :

"Hey... Fiona, what's wrong ?"

I pressed myself against him, burying my face in his chest, sobbing.

"I... I don't know... It's that lightmare again..."

He hugged me soflty, whispering gentle words and stroking my hair tenderly.

"It's okay, shhhh... I'm here, you're not alone, no one can hurt you..."

The vision had to be a lie, it had to be ! Yes, it was impossible, there was an easy explanation for it. Of course. What Ashura had revealed to me about being the god of war had worried me, I had thought and thought about it, and of course my subconscious mind had transformed the whole thing into that terrible nightmare. Damn, it would have been useful to start a therapy. Kujaku's fingers very gently wiped my tears away, and he laid a soft kiss on my brow, asking :

"Are you feeling better now ?"

I nodded, unwilling to move. He smiled.

"Good, because we're going to have a luxurious supper tonight !"

I punched him on the left side, muttering :

"Swindler !"

I smiled. The vision was far away now, thanks to him. Maybe I truly loved him, just maybe he truly loved me too... Thinking, he said :

"This is going to end late. Mmmh... I hate to imagine you going back home alone at night..."

He looked at me.

"Tell you what : why don't you stay at my place ? My bed is more than big enough for the both of us..."

Taken aback, I didn't answer immediately, and he laughed. Damn him, it was another of his silly jokes. I blushed and hid my face in my hands, shaking my head.

"Gods, what have I done to deserve you ?"

Gently, his hands took mine and he made me look at him. There was no trace of laughter in his eyes.

"Nothing gentle lady... No you certainly didn't do anything..."

He smiled wistfully.

"But life is unfair..."

There was a deep sadness in his voice. His look was so grave... I shook my head, uneasy and afraid.

"What do you mean ? I don't understand..."

His index finger rested on my lips, silencing me. His other hand softly caressed my face, and he kissed me tenderly. At last, he whispered :

"I love you... Please stay with me tonight..."

I didn't want to be away from him, I never wanted to leave him, but... I said :

"Promise me... Promise me you won't..."

He hugged me very gently and his lips brushed my hair.

"I don't know who hurt you in the past Fiona, but I swear to you, I will never do anything to harm you if it is in my power to prevent it."

At that moment, Cloud and Shadow began to challenge each other, and we went to them as fast as we could before they could wreak havoc and hurt themselves. Kujaku had a small explanation with his horse, while I was having one with Cloud, who snorted, not giving a damn about love and romanticism.




I yawned loudly. The sun was coming above the horizon, a new day of work was about to begin. I thought of Kujaku and felt warm all over. He was wonderful. For the first time in my life, I dared thinking happiness might exist... But of course something had had to be wrong : I had left important documents at home, and so had had to get up very early in order to retrieve them before going to the office. Kujaku had tried to keep me in bed, and, well... He had almost managed to... I blushed, wishing I could send my responsabilities to hell.

I opened the door, and found Ashura and Yasha waiting for me. I froze, surprised. I had warned them I wouldn't be coming back, and at this early time I hadn't expected to see them awake. Ashura looked sad, and fearful, while Yasha looked even more somber than ever. Ashura bowed her head.

"We have to leave Fiona. We have to go away from you. I am sorry."

End of Part 5.


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